Izinsuku ezingaphumelelanga zonke ... Imoto yafafaza wena kusuka kuma-puddles, umqashi ufunga emsebenzini, futhi umuntu othandekayo wakhetha ukuhlwitha embhedeni esikhundleni sakusihlwa sothando. Kepha abanye ngaleso sikhathi bakhona naphezu futhi bawela impilo ngegama elithi "strip emnyama", kanti abanye bangathula. Silandisa ngokugcina kulokhu okubonakalayo, nazi izici zabo:
Ukumelana Nengcindezelo
Ngokuya nge-psychology namuhla, "ukumelana kuyimfanelo engachazeki evumela abanye abantu ukuthi badideke ngokuphila nokubuya, okungenani baqine njengakuqala. Esikhundleni sokuvumela ubunzima nokwehluleka ukuwakhipha, bathola indlela yokuvuka emlotheni. " Leli yikhono elikuvumela ukuthi usinde ezikhathini ezinzima futhi uthole "uhlangothi oluhle kakhulu". Uyolithola kuphi leli khono? Lesi sihloko esibhalelwe iHarvard ephakeme esikoleni sezemfundo, sichaza ukuthi "ukuqina kuncike ekusekeleni, ubudlelwane obusabelayo kanye nokwenza kahle amakhono angasisiza ukuba sisabele kahle futhi sizijwayeze ubunzima." UDkt Jack Schoccoff, umqondisi wesikhungo sokukhulisa ingane eHarvard, uthi: "Kungamakhono kanye nobudlelwano obungaphenduka ukucindezelwa okunobuthi ekubekezeleleni". Ingqondo ibopha ingozi engapheli kanye nengcindezi, ingavumeli ingane encane ukuba ibhekane nayo ngendlela enempilo. Kulesi sihloko esifanayo, ocashunwe ekuqaleni, izici ezine ezingasiza ekuthuthukiseni leli khono elidingekayo:
Okungenani ubudlelwane obuqinile bokunakekelwa nokusekelwa phakathi kwengane nomzali
Umuntu kufanele azizwe ekwazi "ukulawula" ubunzima bempilo
Ikhono elinamandla lokuzilawula
Uhlelo oluqinile lwezinkolelo noma ukholo lwenkolo
Funda ukuphumula futhi unciphise okungekuhle
Photo: Unsplisish.com.
Ukudala
Kuningi okushiwo ngobuhlobo phakathi kokuqamba nokugula kwengqondo. Izifundo eziningana zachaza ubudlelwano phakathi kwazo zaphakamisa izinsiza eziningi ukwenza izindlela zokulungisa. Ocwaningweni olushicilelwe ku-magazine Runnity Research Journal, izindlela ezahlukahlukene zokuthonya ubuqambi bempilo yethu yansuku zonke bafundwa. Ngokusho kwababhali, "ubuhlakani bezinsuku zonke buhlanganisa ushintsho emisebenzini okulindelwe: livela kwinkambiso yezinto eziqondayo, ezithintekayo, ezomuntu siqu nezenhlalo futhi libonakaliswa ngokuvuleleka, ukuguquguquka, ukuzimela, amahlaya, ukulungela. " Ubuqambi busho amandla okuxazulula amaphazili empilo. Indlela esibona ngayo izimo zethu zansuku zonke. Iphuzu lokubuka esilisebenzisayo lapho sibhekene nemizwa engathandeki, efuna kakhulu ukuqeda. Umbono wethu ngomsebenzi, ubudlelwano, umhlaba wangaphakathi, imizwa - nokuthi sifinyelela kanjani izinhloso zethu.
Umbuthano
Ukusungula - ikhono elibalulekile elivame ukunganakwa. Ngokwe-Psychology Namuhla, lokhu kusho ukuthi "ikhono lezenhlalo, okuncike kakhulu ekuxhumaneni okusebenzayo ngenkathi ehlonipha imicabango kanye nezifiso zabanye, izidingo, izidingo kanye nemingcele yazo kwabanye. " Kwabaningi kulula ukusho kunokukwenza. Imvamisa, singakuthola kunzima ukuveza imizwa yethu engathandeki, esondele kakhulu kubantu abaphoqelele ukuba bazizwe kanjena (abazali, izingane, umlingani, inhloko, abalingani, abangane). Ucwaningo olushicilelwe e-Journal of Clinical Psychology Science kanye nokwenza okukhombisa ukuthi ukuqeqeshwa kokuzethemba kungaba wusizo kubantu abathambekele kokuhlangenwe nakho. Abantu abazwa umuzwa oqinile wokukhathazeka noma ukudabuka okungenakunqotshwa kungaba wusizo ukusebenza kuleli khono elithile ngesethi yazo yamathuluzi. Lokhu akusisizi nje kuphela ukuveza imizwa yethu, izidingo nezifiso zethu ziphilile futhi kucace, kepha futhi kunomthelela omuhle ebuhlotsheni bethu, ekhaya nasemsebenzini.
Bheka ukuguquguquka kwengqondo
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Ukuguquguquka Kwengqondo
Wake waba nesimo lapho uchitha isikhathi esiningi ukuhlela okuthile, kuphela ukusiqonda leso sikhathi akulungele ukukudumala? Izimpendulo zale mibuzo zingasisiza ekunqumeni indlela yokucabanga kwakho "ngezindinganiso". Uma, ngokwesibonelo:
Ngazizwa ngiphoxeka ngokudumazeka, kodwa kwasheshe kwaqala ukuguqula lezi zinhlelo
bazithathile bezokwakha kabusha amasu abo
Ukuzwakalise ngokunempilo ukudumazeka kwabo, kwabe sekuqhamuka nohlelo B.
... ngakho-ke kungenzeka ukuthi ucabangile uguquguqukayo. Kuleli khono lokuvula uhlelo B futhi kunokuvumelana nezimo zengqondo. Ngokusho kukaDkt Clifford Lazarus, ezinye izindlela zokwandisa lokhu kuguquguquka - ukufunda okuthile okusha nsuku zonke, kuvame ukwenza okuthile okusha futhi ngamabomu ashiye indawo yokududuza.
Ukuzazisa
Futhi okokugcina kepha akubalulekile kangako ukuzibonela. Leli yikhono okunzima kakhulu ukulithola, kepha uma litholwa futhi lifakwe kusethi yakho yamathuluzi, lingakwenza lula ukuthuthuka kwamanye amakhono ashiwo kulesi sihloko esishiwo kulesi sihloko esishiwo kulesi sihloko esishiwo kulesi sihloko. Ukuzazisa yikhono lokuzinaka wena, imicabango yalo, isenzo, isimilo, imizwa kanye nezindlela zobudlelwano nabanye abantu ukufeza ukuthuthuka okukhulu. Ngokombono wokuzilungiselela, ukuzazi akunangqondo ukuthi awunjalo nalokho okudingeka 'kukulungile'. Esikhundleni salokho, kubukeka emhlabeni wakho wangaphakathi ngokweluku lwelukuluku nokucwaninga. Zibuze kaningi imibuzo efana:
Abantu bangibona njengoba ngifuna ukukubona?
Ngabe ngixhumana nabantu ngendlela engithanda ngayo?
Veza imizwa yami ngendlela enempilo futhi ayiyona ingozi kwabanye?
Ukuzazisa kuvula ithuba lokuzibheka - ekukhulisweni kwawo, izwe langaphakathi, izindlela zabo zokunqoba - ngaphambi kokubheka abanye. Kepha ungalokothi ukhohlwe ukwenza lokhu ngozwela, ukubekezela nokuqonda.