Many of us since childhood learn to polite communication, which is just necessary for the correct construction of a dialogue with the interlocutor, however, very often a person tries so hard to enter trust and like another that completely forgets about his principles and interests. The fear of being rejected goes from childhood, and it's not so easy to fight him. To help you get up on the path of "corrections" and, finally, learn to defend your interests in communicating with another person, we have prepared several tips that will help you say "no."
Stop thinking
The side effect of excessive politeness, especially with a close surrounding, becomes the desire to enter the position of the person who offers you. When you receive a proposal, for example, spend together the evening, but time does not suit you categorically, some people begin to hastily change plans, just not to offend a person. Do not do it this way. Take yourself in hand and say that today you can't, but there is a "window" in the week, if convenient, you are ready to change the plans to be slightly. But never go on.
Do not be afraid to offend someone to offend
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No excuse
Very often, after the non-refusal failure, there is a reproach or even open aggression on the part of a person who could not be sold. At this moment, many break and the manipulator understands that you can easily "put in place." It is especially unpleasant when good familiar or relatives enjoy your reliability - as a rule, this category is the most difficult to refuse. Remember, for sure in your life there was a situation where the relatives asked to live with you or the help of any help to which you were not ready. Following the uncertain refusal, you heard something like: "Well, it's hard for you?" You can instantly feel guilty and immediately agree. This is what your friend sought. Work to eradicate the feeling of inconvenience for your words, if you understand that your personal boundaries are encroaching the most impulse.
Take extra time
Often, manipulators are trying to "sell" their ideas in that they do not give time to meditation. In the stressful situation, we often make a decision that can register in the future. Do not be afraid to interrupt the stream of the word of the interlocutor and clearly understand that you will not instantly make a decision - always take the time to think about the proposal, so you will definitely avoid the consequences of the wrong decision.