It would seem if two people love each other, what can they prevent them together? In essence, nothing. But sometimes it turns out that the responsibility has to take not only for the future wife or husband, but also for their children from the first marriages. Nowadays, this situation can be called widespread. And, purely theoretically, she does not scare anyone, but from a practical point of view the complexity arise here, then there. And the difficulties of these life spoil not only a man and a woman, they, first of all, are reflected in children: they lead to the wrong perception of themselves, they give rise to complexes, the constant feeling of guilt, prevent them from the subtraction to build their personal relations with the representatives of the opposite sex and, most importantly , disagree - children, at some point cease to feel necessary and loved ones.
As a man avoid typical errors in relationships with a woman who already has a child:
one. You are not No. 1 in a relationship with a woman which has a child from the first marriage. For a woman, "Number One" is often their own children, such is her nature - she will be zealously defending the rights of their kids, it does not matter - from the first they are marriage or from jointly with you (although, of course, there are exceptions in this rule).
2. The love of the child must earn! Do not assume that your wife's child will respect you a priori. Unconditional love, trust and respect are experiencing to their own parents, evidence is required from the new person! Since you are a man - you and cards in your hands: Show what you can and need to trust.
3. If you love a woman, try to find a common language with her children - It is just necessary. Few attention to what they are fond of, sincere interest in their problems and small participation in their lives.
four. Children jealous! Children are small owners: they do not want to share their love love with anyone. This truth should be adopted as an axiom that does not require evidence.
five. Never put your favorite woman before choosing : "Either I, or your child." This in any case will not lead to anything good.
If you really sincerely love a woman, her children will be your friends, and you, if you try, will become a close person. Children are so arranged: sincerity they feel behind the mile, they are ready to accept any new man provided that he is ready for their mother on the most ridiculous feats and real men's deeds. Children, unlike adults, do see the heart.
Psychologist Maria Andreeva
What to do a woman when a new man appears in her life and her child's life:
1. remember that your husband needs to love and respect . Sometimes take his side, even if it seems to you that you are always right.
2. Do not repeat with enviable regularity : "This is my child - herself will deal with him!" Such a relationship provokes a man to answer you once: "Your child, disassemble myself!"
3. Let her husband take part in the upbringing of your child . As a rule, men always see the situation slightly under a different angle, therefore, they are able to solve problems in other ways.
four. Motivate the child with respect to treat your chosen one At least because it is an adult man.
five. Do not force the child to call your new husband "dad" . The child is able to determine how and whom to call.
In life, we often make mistakes, for many such a mistake the previous marriage becomes. But children born in the "unsuccessful" marriage are your children, therefore, entering into new relationships, make sure that you are nearby that the very person you can entrust your children - this is perhaps the most important advice . Try to be in something politician. Think about your steps, do not commit to those actions that will regret, love both children and her husband. Always listen to your children, do not go to anyone about, because you conductor of this little orchestra called "Family".