How to determine if you have a love dependence
What feelings appear with your thought that a loved one may disappear? And with the thought, what is he or she better and successful us? If you understand what you see in the representative of the opposite sex of the competitor, who wants to get around; parent, who wants to cry in a vest; The child you are striving to control, then you can talk about your love dependency.
What does it lead to
What happens to a man, confident that life does not make sense if there is no "object of love" nearby? There is a feeling of internal emptiness, own inferiority, hopelessness, panic ...
Olga Romaniv
How to get rid of it
First step: Recognize that you are dependent. If in the descriptions of love dependence, you learned yourself - they took the first step to getting rid of their illness.
Second step: afford to feel. If there was a desire to feel angry, sadness, fear, guilt, pain - do not oppose this. The need for another person is very strong. We convince ourselves that it could be worse if the partner is cruel, do not allow the feelings that he could condemn. Having confessed in your own experiences, you extend my help myself.
Third step: Taking yourself. Since childhood, we strive to meet the established requirements in order to earn parental love and in no way disappear around. Over time, the instructions of external censors turn into our inner voice. The desire to deserve love we subsequently "Tyant" in relations with a partner. Your task is to remember yourself in preschool age. Hug a child in your image, take care of him, love. Perform this exercise every day - and you will notice that in the world so much interesting, except the object you endowed with superstibility.
Fourth Step: self-esteem and respect for yourself. Working on the previous step, you will definitely approximate your own forces. You will be easier to talk about the feelings you experienced, follow our own beliefs, defend your point of view. Important moment: Check yourself, rejoice in your achievements, sincerely smile and surrounding people.
The famous psychologist Mikhail Litwak wrote about the study dedicated to the choice of partner and spouse. During the survey, women asked to choose the explanation of the love that they like more. Three options were offered: "I can't live without you," "I will never hurt you," let's pull the strap life together. " According to the results of 75% of women, the option "I can't live without you."
Litvak noted that such an explanation in love is peculiar to a infantile child or an alcoholic. At the same time, true, complete adoption and responsibility: "Let's pull the strap life together" - no one from those who participated in the study did not like.
Therefore, before declare the "end of the world without a loved one," think that you are managed - love or addiction.