Ukukhohlisa kwengqondo kuyindlela ejwayelekile kakhulu yokuxhumana. Emindenini lapho behlulekile khona ukwakha ubuhlobo ekuxhumaneni okuqondile (angifuni - ukwenza, ngicela), xoxisana, wenze ukuyekethisa, ukugcwala kwenkohliso. Uhlobo olufanayo lokuxhumana luvame ukulandelwa ebudlelwaneni bezingane zabadala nabazali. Futhi-ke, kubangela izinkinga.
Imvamisa sibona indlela enjalo yokuxhumana yabazali abanezingane zabo ezindala, njenge-blackmail. "Uma ungenzi, ngeke ubuyele ngesikhathi, ngeke uhlukane nale ntombazane - ngizoba nokuhlaselwa yinhliziyo, ingcindezi izogxuma." Futhi vele ugxume, futhi lokhu kuhlaselwa kwenzeke. Noma zinakekele ukuthuka: "Akekho oqondayo, njengoba ngizwa kabi, ngizibuze wonke la mazwi (a)," ngikwenzela okuningi, "
Umuzwa wecala yindlela enobuntu yendlela yokwenza ingane yabantu abadala ukuthi yini edingekayo ngumzali wayo. "Ngininikeze, onkulunkulu abasindayo, wawugula kaningi, ngoba awuzange uye emsebenzini, angizange ngishade ngenxa yakho, ngakubeka impilo yami yonke ... - nawe!" Bese kuthi-ke uhlu, ukuthi yini ongayenzi umama noma ubaba wakho. Ukuvalwa okucashile, kuthule futhi kwesinye isikhathi kukuphinda ngakunye nokuphindisela okuyisimungulu. Noma ayibheki eceleni kwakho nhlobo, okubuye kwatholakala kakhulu yizingane, noma ngabe sekuyisikhathi eside kudala.
Uthisi RGGU, isazi sezengqondo uMaria Andreeva
Izinsizakalo Zokushicilela Izinsiza
Umgxeki oqhubekayo wokuthi izingane zizwa ekhelini labo, futhi isifiso sokuthola uthando lwabazali kuqala ukwenza konke noma okuningi akufunayo. Ukuvunywa "Akunazingane ezinhle ezanele" ezivame ukuzwakala emindenini. Noma yini oyenzayo, kuyohlale kubi ngaso sonke isikhathi, kepha othile muhle: Umakhelwane, umfowabo, emshadweni.
Wonke umuntu uyakuqonda ukuthi ukuphehla amandla okusebenza, kepha izinsizakusebenza zangaphakathi nokwethembeka kulahlekelwe nabo ukuze wenqabe okungenani ingxenye yazo. Izingane zabantu abadala abakhohliswa yibo abazali bazisola kakhulu ngabantu bazo 'abadala.' Bayakhumbula ukuthi bangakanani isikhathi abatshale imali laba bantu ukuze bakhule, banikeze imfundo, kwenye indawo abahlabela izintshisekelo zabo. Imvamisa, lokhu kuqashelwa kuza lapho izingane zabo zizalwa, ngakho-ke zilungele ukunqotshwa ukuziphatha kwabazali babo asebekhulile. Kwenzeka ukuthi izingane ezindala zibonakala sengathi zingukuthi abazali bazo ziphelele nje, benza konke ukuze yena, ingane, ukuthi wayenelungelo lokuphila kwakhe.
Izingane ezisebenzisa abazali zivame ukuba zingokomzwelo, zibucayi, zingavikeleki ngokwazo, zingezwa ukubaluleka kwazo, zincike emibonweni yabazali, ikakhulukazi ekwamukelweni kwabazali, zisola njalo kukho konke, zigweme. Imvamisa badlala ngokungazi indima 'yezisulu'.
Enye indlela yokuxazulula izingxabano ukwakha kabusha ubuhlobo bakho nokukhohlisa abazali. Le yindlela evuthiwe kunazo zonke, kepha ngasikhathi sinye nzima kakhulu. Abantu abaningi abakholelwa ukuthi ubudlelwano ababefakwe kulo kusukela ebuntwaneni kuyabonakala ukuguquka.
Ungayixazulula kanjani inkinga yokukhohlisa abazali yizingane?
Ngokukhohlisa ungabhekana nakho
I-Pixabay.com/RU.
1. Okokuqala, kubalulekile ukuqonda nokubona ukuthi ukukhohlisa kwabazali akuyona ububi. Bavela embondweni ongafuneki, ekungavikelekeni emabuthweni abo, kusukela esifisweni sokwenza konke kube kuhle kuwe. Ekugcineni, ngoba umama, mhlawumbe, ebuntwaneni, futhi wabhala nabazali bakhe.
2. Ukuthola ukuthi umama naye ungumuntu, ecacisa ukuthi hlobo luni lomuntu. Yini oyaziyo ngobuntwana bayo ebuntwaneni, ubudlelwano nabazali, mayelana nokuthi kungani akhetha umsebenzi wakhe. Noma yimiphi imininingwane ibalulekile. Cabanga nje ukuthi uqoqa izinto ze-biography yayo. Zizwe ngathi umuntu omdala wabazali babo. Impela entweni enaye okuhlangenwe nakho okwengeziwe, ngaphandle kwalokho, uhlobisa ikhambi elivuthiwe lokuyeka ukuba yinto yokukhohlisa. Zama ukwelapha umzali wakho ukuya kuma-manipulator wakho njengodokotela ungowesiguli: ngobunono, ngokuqinile, ngesineke. Akunasidingo sokufinyelelwa, ukuveza, thola ubuhlobo. Ngaphambi kwakho isiphambano phakathi kwesiguli nengane. Musa "ukuhlukanisa" kumzali kuzama ukukudonsela emhlangeni futhi ungakunaki konke ukuhlolwa kwabazali okufaka ikheli lakho.
3. Emva kwalokho, kufanele uqale ukwakha kabusha ubuhlobo bakho nabazali bakho. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, kancane kancane wandise ibanga phakathi kwabo nempilo yayo yangasese. Ungavumeli abazali esikhaleni sakho siqu, ungenzi ithuba lokukwesabisa ngezingcingo. Kungcono ukuzibiza ngokwakho - futhi hhayi ngokohlelo, kodwa kungazelelwe.
4. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, abazali akufanele babe nomuzwa wokuthi ubaxosha ngamabomu empilweni yakho: Khombisa ukunakekelwa, banikeze izipho ezincane, uma unethuba - phumani ndawonye. Ekugcineni, ubani omdala kakhulu lapha - ngabe wena noma abazali? Isitshalo sabazali esinye isifundo: Ukuncipha kwesisindo, ukuhambela echibini, ukulalela ama-audiobook, inzalo njalo, ukuthi inqubo iqhubeka kanjani, kwesinye isikhathi ungagaya ukuze ubhaka.