"Kuyiqiniso, umyeni wakho unazo izithiyo zawo! Ukube wayengcwele, akasoze awashade, "kusho uDalegie uDalegie. Ngimthanda kakhulu lo Carnegie, ngoba abesifazane abangajabule emshadweni bavame ukusola bonke abantu futhi akuvamile ukubona ukushiyeka kwabo. Kepha uma wena, zintokazi, okungenani kanye, okungenani ngokwengqondo, zishintsha ngendima yakho yesigamu, ngiyakuqinisekisa, amagama amaningi nezenzo zabayeni bakho zizoqondakala ngokuphelele.
Le ndatshana iye yathuthukiswa ukuthi ibhale iqiniso elimangalisayo. Muva nje, abafazi baze kimi ekwamukeleni, abanazo amadoda amahle: benakekela uthando, benesineke, kodwa ... kwaba yisidina kakhulu. Ucansi luyajwayelekile, ubuhlobo bubushelelezi, futhi ngakho-ke abanalo ubukhali, omisiwe, uthando, nawumi lapha uguqulwa. Omncane noma cha kakhulu, ngefulethi noma ngaphandle, ofundile noma osebenzayo, akunandaba. Into esemqoka ukuthi musha! Njengengubo, isikhwama, izicathulo ... zigqoka ngendlela ehlukile, zithi, iphunga ... futhi ucansi naye futhi akujwayelekile, kuqhamuke, kubonakale kanjani, kuthembekile, Njll - Uhlu lungaqhubeka ngokungenamkhawulo. Owesifazane ngamunye othandweni uyohlala ethola ukuthi yini okufanele avume.
Enye yekhasimende lami, echaza uhlobo lwesithandwa sami, yathi ngenjabulo: "Nkulunkulu wami, yini eliyingozi! Konke kungenza ngibize! Wenza konke okuphambene! ". Futhi ngasikhathi sinye ngangilalela futhi ngizibuza ukuthi ulindeni? Uma manje, onqenqemeni lobuhlobo, yena, kuzoba njalo-ke, kuzoba nini ubuvangele, izinkinga zizothatha, izinkinga ziyokwenza? Kepha ekuhambeni kwemizwa yakho, asicabangi ngakho! Kubonakala ngathi ukuthi ekugcineni ngafika wuthando lweqiniso, okusho ukuthi kuzoba okuphakade, futhi phambili intokozo nenjabulo kuphela. Futhi ukuphishekela lokhu, sibhubhisa konke okusendleleni, singacabangi, sibheke umndeni, izingane, abazali. Futhi yini ke?
Angikhumbuli icala elilodwa elimangalisayo. Owesifazane wafika ekwamuleleni kwami iminyaka engama-38. Kuyathakazelisa impela, zizethembela kuwe, kepha ngasikhathi sinye nge-psyche ekhishwe ngokuphelele. Ephendula noma yimuphi umbuzo, ngokushesha waqala wakhala. Ekugcineni, isithombe esilandelayo sadonswa. Unomyeni. Kuhle, okuthembekile, okunothando. Kepha emsebenzini wahlangana nenye indoda, encane iminyaka engu-15. I-romance enesivunguvungu iwile. Iklayenti lami lalikulungele ukucekela phansi umndeni bese liya esithandwa sakhe. Kepha lapha kwenzeka kungalindelekile. Insizwa enenhlabathi enovalo elahlekile. Waqala ukuwuthwala kodokotela, uthenge imishanguzo, ukhokhele ukwelashwa. Kepha odokotela bezibikezelo zokududuza abanikezwanga. Kusesimweni sokudideka okuphelele, ukwesaba nokungavikeleli kimi nalona wesifazane eza. Wayekulungele ukuyeka umyeni wakhe aphenduke umhlengikazi womncane omncane kunakhe iminyaka eyi-15, ngaphandle kwemfundo, ngaphandle komsebenzi, ngaphandle kwezindlu. Ngabe ucabangani ngokuthuthuka kwale noveli? Yebo, ungacabanga ukuthi uthando ludala izimangaliso. Le nsizwa yelapha, yaphothula isikhungo, yathola umsebenzi futhi yahlala ibonga njalo uMsindisi wayo futhi imthanda impilo yakhe yonke ... kodwa ingahle ihluke ngokuphelele. Sibheke izindlela ezahlukahlukene, kepha ukukhetha namanje kusasele kwikhasimende lami, futhi ngimfisela ngobuqotho iphutha elibulalayo.
Ezweni lethu, cishe amasehlukaniso acishe abe ngu-70% avela ekuzinikeleni kwabesifazane. Kepha ngasikhathi sinye hhayi wonke umuntu oshadile. Vele, uma umyeni engumlutha wezidakamizwa, umdidiyeli noma utshwala, lapho-ke umbuzo wesehlukaniso awukufanele. Kufanele kube yisixazululo esiqinile futhi esingathandeki. Ngaphandle kwalokho, impilo yakho izophenduka uchungechunge lwemicimbi ebusuku obuhlale igcina ngokudabukisayo. Futhi umbono wabathandi babesifazane ngalokho abazokusindisa abathandekayo babo emikhubeni ethile eyingozi, ngephutha ngokujulile. Uthola imikhuba efanayo noma umzabalazo waphakade wokuchitha amandla akho, ubusha, impilo. Ingabe ikhona imali enkulu? Ngakho-ke, namuhla sikhuluma ngoba kungani abesifazane beshiya amadoda amahle, bengafuni ukugcina umshado.
Ngokwezibalo, abesifazane abanomsebenzi omuhle futhi iholo livame ukukhonzwa ngesehlukaniso. Kepha ukuze ube nomsebenzi omuhle kanye nomholo ophakeme, owesifazane onjalo akufanele akhathazeke ukwakha imisebenzi yawo, imvamisa ekulimaleni komndeni. Futhi abayeni abahle, bavune ama-halves abo, bakha, noma bakwazisa konke ukunakekelwa kwasekhaya nokukhulisa izingane, noma ukuqasha ama-nannies nabanikeli bezindlu. Izindima zemindeni ziguqulwa. Unkosikazi uba yi-Getter, ethatha yonke imisebenzi yamaKhomanisi, futhi umyeni unikeza kancane lesi sikhundla futhi ... ekugcineni ulahlekelwe isithandwa sakhe. Emehlweni akhe ungumuntu obuthakathaka, olahlekile noRookha. Kepha owesifazana ngokwakhe asakhe imodeli yomndeni enjalo ngezandla zakhe?
Wajwayela ukuhola, enze izinqumo, yiba ngokwakho. Ngakho-ke, unesizungu. Ngoba umndeni ubambiswano, lo ngumdlalo weqembu, futhi akukho abaphathi kanye nabangaphansi. Kepha kunzima kanjani ekhaya usomabhizinisi ophumelelayo ukuba abe ngowesifazane onothando, onakekelayo. Ngakho-ke kwamangaza abanye: muhle, muhle, futhi uhlakaniphile, futhi ocebile, noyedwa. Futhi yini enye oyidingayo bafo? Futhi amadoda adinga ukuba ngumuntu omuhle nje. Pinkin, emthonjeni, ngobuqotho. Yize kunjalo, uhlala nemodeli, ikhanda noma indlovukazi yobuhle, okungukuthi, nendoda. Kepha abesifazane abalandela izindinganiso zabo balahlekelwa ngumndeni obiza kakhulu. Futhi manje emsebenzini uzakwabo wavela. Ukukhanya kokuqala, ukumamatheka, futhi njengenhliziyo eshaya ebusheni, futhi lapho ukuqabula kukhunjulwa, ikhanda liphuma futhi ligcwele kakhulu ngaphakathi. Futhi manje umyeni wakudala uqala ukulimala nje. Amasokisi, asakazeke efulethini, ingxoxo enkulu ocingweni, umkhuba wokungashiyi izihlalo zangasese - konke kudala ukucasuka nokunganeliseki. Futhi lapho sithukuthele kakhulu ngomyeni wakho, amaphuzu amaningi athola okhethiweyo wethu omusha. "Ngeke ngibone ukuthi udla kanjani, amahlathi, uphefumula kanjani uhlala ufuna okhiye bemoto ..." - Ngizwa la magama ekuhlelweni njalo. Kodwa ingabe unaso isiqinisekiso sokuthi, ukwephula umndeni nokushiya umyeni wakho, ingabe uzothola injabulo yakho? Ngemuva kwakho konke, konke kuzobe kufana maduze. Intshisakalo yento enhle kakhulu izoba buthaka kancane kancane, iphume emikhubeni yakhe emibi, imvamisa imnandi ukwedlula umyeni wakudala, isuka efulethini lakho, kuzovela izinkinga ngezingane?
Kukhona enye inketho uma umfazi ehamba ecebe futhi ephumelele kunomyeni wangaphambili. Kepha akamsoli ngisho nokuthi ulindile. Lapha ngokusatshalaliswa kwezindima konke ngokusobala. Futhi usevele wenza izinqumo lapho azohlala khona nobani abangabangane, lapho okufanele aphumule - esisekelweni esilula ukuthi ungumuntu onomfazi. Ingabe uLady ozimele alungele ukushintsha umlingiswa wakho ngokushesha? Angiqiniseki.
Manje-ke kufanele konke ngenxa yokufihla amathemba nezinzuzo ezingathandeki? Ingabe ungowokushada naye, awunathemba? Yize kunjalo, wake wamthanda, waphupha ngomndeni, wethemba injabulo. Yini eshintshile? Ungamsoli wonke umyeni wakho, uyavuma ngokweqiniso, yini oyenzile kabi, yini amaphutha akho? Bese uzama ukusindisa umshado wakho. Egibele amahhashi akuyona nje kuphela inhlala-kahle yakho, izolile, ukuzethemba ikusasa, kepha into ebaluleke kakhulu yizingane zakho ezizojabula ngeqiniso lokuthi umama wazo ebuntwaneni base besondele.
Yini okufanele uyenze lokhu? Amathiphu alula:
1. Cabanga futhi uvume ngokweqiniso ukuthi uthola, ukucekela phansi umndeni, nokuthi yikuphi ukulahlekelwa. Thatha iphepha bese ubhala zonke izinzuzo ne- "minuses". Ngiyakuqinisekisa izinto eziningi.
2. Zama ukuqala ngokwakho ekubuyiseni ubudlelwano nomyeni wakho - qala ngokumamatheka okulula. Akukho okudinga ukwenziwa - vele umamatheke kaningi, futhi uzobona ukuthi liyini amandla okumamatheka.
3. Nikeza umyeni wakho futhi ukuze uzizwe njengomuntu. Ake okungenani into izoba njengoba ifuna. Zama - kwesinye isikhathi ubuthakathaka ukuze ube muhle kakhulu.
4. Zama ukungalungisi isigamu sakho. Umsebenzi unovalo futhi ungavikeli.
5. Thatha isinqumo sokugcina kuphela ngemuva kokuqonda ukuthi umshado wakho akunakwenzeka ukondla.
Ngiyethemba ngokweqiniso ukuthi, mhlawumbe le ndatshana izosiza ukugcina umshado, futhi ngifisa bonke abesifazane ukuthi bangabi nesizungu futhi bakhumbule: "Lowo mndeni, lapho abesifazane bevutha khona. Ngaso sonke isikhathi uthela umndeni lapho bejabule khona. "