Ungajabula ebudlelwaneni ngisho noma umlingani engakufaki lutho. Ukuziphatha okunjalo okunjalo kokubuka kokuqala kuchazwa ukufakwa okujwayelekile kokubukezwa kwakho. Ngeshwa, izibalo ziqinisekisa inani elikhulu lemibhangqwana elinemodeli efanayo yobudlelwano: cishe ama-20% ezinhlangano eMelika kuphela kubhekwa njengokuhlukumeza i-American Family Therapy Center (ngokwe-AAMFT). Ihlukanisa izitshalo ezijwayelekile ezimweni ezinjalo futhi isiza ukuwasusa.
"Ngiphila ngabo bonke ngilungele, ngakho-ke ngihlala ngingenalutho."
Yini ongayisho, futhi imvelo yokuzivikela kithi sonke sisebenza ngokuphelele. Abesifazane abaningi bahlala nabalingani kuphela ngoba babanikela - kusukela ezindlini kuya emalini ezingutsheni. Lesi simo sikhula kuphela lapho intombazane ingena ekhefini lokukhulelwa futhi lihlala nengane. Kumasiko ethu, akusona ngokwesiko ukuba ngumsebenzi endlini kanye nokunakekelwa kwengane komsebenzi wamanje - kukhuthaza ukuthi le yindima yobulili kanye nomsebenzi ongcwele wowesifazane. Eqinisweni, imisebenzi yasekhaya kanye nezingane ezikhulisiwe kufanele ziqhubeke emahlombe bakubo bobabili abazali. Futhi wena, ukuze ungabi esimweni esinjalo, kufanelekile ukucabanga ngokuzihlinzeka ngesimemezelo kusenesikhathi: Ukuqashwa okusemthethweni kanye nomholo ophakeme kuzosungula isibonelelo esifanele, kodwa ongasindile ingane.
Ungajahi imali ebudlelwaneni, uthando lubaluleke kakhulu
Photo: Unsplisish.com.
"Manje uyamemeza, kepha-ke uzakuza nesipho"
Amajazi e-Fur, ama-Smartphones, zonke izipho ezinkulu ngemuva kokuxabana nomlingani azikhulumi ngokubhekelwa kwakhe nemizwa yecala, kodwa mayelana nokuphazamiseka kwengqondo. Emcabangweni wokuziphatha okuhlukumezayo, iphethini enjalo ibizwa ngokuthi yi-honeymoon: Abasebenzi ngemuva kokuhlelwa kwezandla nokuthukwa kwakho ngezipho, indoda ikwenza ukhohlwe ngokwenzekile futhi uvule kabusha ukuze alawule futhi amvule futhi ukuthi alawule. Uma unomuzwa wokuthi ukondla imizwa engemihle futhi usuvele uye engxabanweni, udinga ukuza ukuthola izeluleko kudokotela wezifo zengqondo - lokhu kuyinkulumo yangempela yalowo ohlukunyeziwe kanye nomdlwenguli, ongapheli lutho oluhle.
"Kulungile - ngiyazibuza, kepha ngeke ngedwa"
Akunangqondo ukudela injabulo empilweni yakho yomuntu siqu ukuze umlingani omuhle kuwo wonke amapharamitha. Manje udlala ngemizwa yomuntu ngenkathi ikubheka othandweni ngamehlo, bese ebona isimo sakho sengqondo futhi aqala ukuziphindisela ngamanga. Ungalaleli labo abathi ngemuva kokuzalwa kwezingane ningezwa uthando ngisho nakubantu abangenandaba - akunjalo. Uzobe ungajabuli ngokwengeziwe ngoba sebehlobene kakhulu nalabo abangenandaba nawe, okuzoholela ezingxabanweni zemindeni phambi kwengane. Ungazihluphi futhi ubeke uthando ngaphezu kwezinzuzo - Imali ingahlala itholwe, kepha awukwazi ukuthenga uthando lwangempela ngabo.
Umshado akufanele ube yinto esemqoka empilweni yakho
Photo: Unsplisish.com.
"Ngamkhumbula, wayengcono kakhulu"
Okunye kwabesifazane okwedlulele abangakwazi ukujabulela umphakathi wabo - ukukhathazeka ngobudlelwano obuvele buphela. Imvamisa inkinga iye kwemvelo emantombazaneni amancane angene ebudlelwaneni babo bokuqala. Kepha kwesinye isikhathi amantombazane andala anolwazi avume iphutha elifanayo lapho ecindezela ngaphandle: kusuka kubazali abafuna ukuba ngugogo nomkhulu, izintombi ezishadile ngisho nodokotela abacophelayo ukuze bakhulelwe ingane. Ukwelashwa kuphela okuzosusa isimo esinjalo, lapho ukhulisa ukuzithemba, uyazi ngokuzimela kwethu ngombono womunye umuntu futhi uthole indlela eya kuwe.