Cishe isikhathi esinzima kunazo zonke empilweni yengane nokuphila kwabazali - iminyaka yokushintsha, eqedwa cishe iminyaka eyi-17. Ngalesi sikhathi, ushintsho futhi kwenzeka ngaphandle kwengane, imizwa ingashintsha njalo ngehora, futhi abazali bamane nje abazi ukuthi benzeni, bavame ukuyeka ukuphelelwa yithemba. Kodwa-ke, ukuzibambisa kangaka kwabazali kungaphula ubuhlobo obuqine kakhulu, ngakho-ke noma yikuphi ukuxhumana kwakho nengane kufanele kube kuhle futhi kungashiyi ukulala okungathandeki ezinhlangothini zombili. Ngakho-ke indlela yokudlula isikhathi seveni ngaphandle kwezingxabano ezinkulu phakathi kwezizukulwane? Sizotshela ngalokhu namhlanje.
Yini engingayenza njengomzali?
Ukuxhumana nengane yakhe, ephendukela kumuntu okhulile kuhlala kungumthetho obaluleke kakhulu. Akufanele nje wenze ukubukeka okunentshisekelo, kepha empeleni uthathe isifiso sokuqonda ukuthi ingane yakho iphilani, yimiphi imizwa ebhekene nayo. Umthetho wesibili obalulekile: Awekho amahlazo. Ukuze wenze lokhu, zama ukungasebenzisi "cha" okuqinile ekukhulumeni kwakho, ungene esikhundleni sokungathathi hlangothi "cishe". Osemusha obhekene nokwakhiwa kabusha kwama-hormonal uzoqala ukuvukela ekuphenduleni ekuvinjelweni kwakho, okuzoholela ekwandisweni nokuhlukunyezwa okukhulu phakathi kwakho.
Kubalulekile futhi ukubheka iminyaka yengane. Masikhulume ngakunye kwazo okuthe xaxa.
Zama ukungahambi "
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Iminyaka engu-12
Njengomthetho, kusukela eminyakeni eyi-12 selokhu kuguqulwa okusobala kakhulu ekubukekeni nasekuziphatheni kwengane kwenzeka. Ingane yakho esevele iba sendleleni yokukhula, nokho, manje isondele ebuntwaneni kunabantu abadala, futhi ngenxa yalokho ingane ingane kulula "ngayo, babala ukuthi ingane yabo" ikhona ngokuphelele Abantu abadala "Ngakho-ke, ngombono wabo, ungashintsha ngokumangazayo amaqhinga wokuziphatha - ukuxhumana kanzima njengabantu abadala. Okomntwana, kuzobe kungalindelekile kakhulu, ngoba akucaci kuye ukuthi kungani kungazelelwe ukuziphatha kwabazali sekuguqukile kakhulu. Esikhundleni semfundo eqinile, zama ukungena esikhundleni sengane: Kuqala ukuguqula ngaphandle, kukhathalela amantombazane engxenye iningi angayazi ukuthi kufanele abhekane kanjani nalezo ezinye izibonisi, ngokwesikhumba noma okufanele akwenze okwenzeka esikhathini. Izingane eziningi azixazululwa engxoxweni nabazali bazo, futhi zivame ukuvalwa ngokwazo. Ungavumeli kwenzeke futhi uthathe igxathu elibheke enganeni yakho.
Iminyaka engu-13
"Ukushayela" kwama-hormone kufinyelela inani lakhe. Kulesi sikhathi, ingane ingaba ngokungalawuleki ngokuphelele. Ingane iqala ukuqonda ukuthi kwenzekani kuye futhi izama ukusheshisa le nqubo ngangokunokwenzeka, ifuna ukuthola ukuzimela ngangokunokwenzeka futhi ibonakale ngamehlo ontanga. Ukusuka lapha, zonke izinto eziyingozi zokuzilibazisa eziyingozi zentsha, enezinto abazali ezidinga ukulawulwa, uma kungenjalo kukhona ithuba lokuthi ingane yakho izohudula ekuhambeni kwezinkinga. Landela ngokucophelela, ozungeza ingane yakho ngaleso sikhathi, kepha ungakhombisi isithakazelo eseqile empilweni yakhe, uma kungenjalo ingane izoqala ukucasulwa ukubamba iqhaza kwakho futhi incane. Ungakuvumeli.
Iminyaka eyi-14
Osemusha phakathi kokuhlelwa kabusha kwangaphakathi nangaphandle. Ngalesi sikhathi, ufuna iziphathimandla ezintsha, ithonya labazali alisasebenzi. Ungacabangi ukuthi ingane yakho yathandana noma yaphela ukuhlonipha, okwamanje idinga ukuzikhomba. Ekamelweni lakhe "angaxazulula" amaphosta abaculi abangaziwa kuwe, azoqala ukukhumbula umculo ocasulayo onyantisayo, kepha into engalungile kakhulu ongayenza ukuqala ukumangalela. Zama ukukhuluma nengane yakho eyeve eshumini nambili, kepha yenza ngenhlonipho, ngemuva kwakho konke awusekwazi ukuxoxa naye njengengane. Udinga ukufezekisa ubudlelwano bokuthembana nengane ye-Adhent, ukuze ucashe ngangokunokwenzeka, wesaba abagxeki.
Iminyaka engu-15-16 ubudala
Isikhathi lapho ingane isivele inenkampani yayo, kuvela imizwa yokuqala engathi sína, usabonakala ekhaya futhi izingxoxo zakho ziyeke ukukhawulelwa ezindabeni zesikole. Manje ingane yakha umbono wokugcina ngokwakhe, wacishe wazamukela okusha, yize kunomsebenzi omningi kuye, ngaphambi kokuba osemusha abe ubuntu obumisiwe ngokuphelele. Osemusha uqala ukwakha imvelo yakhe, ezokwabelana ngezinto zayo, futhi kungenzeka hhayi kuphela ofunda nabo noma abangane engxenyeni yezemidlalo. Lapha, kubalulekile ukuthi abazali bayogcina bengalahlekelwa yi-Thintar nengane, kepha uma unokuxhumana nayo yonke iminyaka edlule, kufanele ube nezinkinga ezinkulu, ngoba into ebaluleke kakhulu esivele siyishilo, ulalele futhi uzwe ingane yakho , kuyilapho bengacindezeli ngokuqinile empilweni yakhe entsha.