Ukwahlulela ngenombolo yezinhlamvu ezaqala ukuza kamuva nje, ngiyabona ukuthi ukuhlaziya amaphupho bekuwusizo empilweni yansuku zonke.
Namuhla, iphupho lomunye wabafundi lizosisiza ukuthola ukuthi yiziphi izisusa ezingasinika ngokungaqondakali esihlobene nengqikithi yezocansi nokuzwela.
Ngesinye isikhathi, uSigmund Freuder waphikisana nokuthi amandla ocansi kumuntu ngamunye angokwemvelo impela. Kodwa-ke, emphakathini, lesi sihloko asivunyelwe. Mayelana nezocansi khuluma kancane, udlula esihlokweni. Ngakho-ke, abaningi bethu abazi lutho ngemvelo yethu, banezinkinga eziningi zocansi, ukunqatshelwa, ngisho nangomlingani onothando abakwazi ukuphumula.
Abenzi besifazane abaningi akulula ukuzizwa be-sexy futhi befiseleka. Naphezu kwemizamo yangaphandle, ukwakheka, izinto ezinhle nezithende ezincanyana, lapho uxhumana namadoda, aphenduka kalula abe ngamahloni, abushelelezi futhi anamahloni, noma afihle umusi wawo ngaphansi kokuzimela kwamamakhi.
Ephusheni, izindlela zokuvikela ze-psyche yethu zibuthaka, futhi zisivumele sizizwe eqinisweni ngokwengeziwe ngocansi futhi zikhange.
Nasi umfundi wamaphupho acele ukuqonda kwakhe ukuthi amtshele ngobufazi kanye nobulili:
"Leli cala liyenzeka esontweni lapho insiza iyeza khona. Nginikezela intombazane emkomeni ethile futhi kufanele ngimbonise indlela yokuhamba ikhampasi. Kepha angikwazi ukukwenza, ngoba kunendawo encane futhi uguqule inkungu. Futhi angazi ukuthi kanjani. Isiko lidlula, nginobuhlalu, okwakukhona ngesikhathi sombusi, kepha ngiyabathatha.
Kamuva ngihleli embuthanweni wabangane bomyeni wami futhi ngikhulume nabo, ngibona ukuthi akufanele kube phakathi kwabo. Futhi siyaxoxa ngakho. Futhi ngibona umyeni ngemuva kwengilazi, eyisiwula nomunye, njengokungathi udakiwe. Futhi ngibatshela, ngibheka lesi sithombe engizoba naso abangane bami abazokuqonda ukuthi ngingaba lapha. Okwamanje ngibona ukuthi umngane wendoda yami ophuzile ubamba kanjani futhi aphonse engilazini. Futhi ngiyamemeza: "Cha!" Ngiyesaba! Futhi vele isigamu ngesigamu ngikhuluma isiyingi: "Kufanele ngibe lapho".
Futhi manje ake siqonde ngemininingwane eminingi.
Ukulala ngokunengqondo kungahlukaniswa izingxenye ezi-2: "Isonto kanye ne-rite yokuqalisa" kanye "nosizi lwabangane bendoda".
Kunezimpawu eziningana zokulala ukuthi kulula ukwenza umcabango: Isonto nokuzinikela isiko. Ukulala kukhombisa ukuthi umfundi wethu kumele abe ukuzinikezela ku- "femune". Ngaphezu kwalokho, kufanele ikwazi ukuzulazula kulolu daba (uphawu lwekhampasi), kepha ngenkathi isihloko senkungu nokuphila kwansuku zonke kwesikhala sakhe esincane. Ngemuva komkhosi, uthatha uphawu lowesifazane (ubuhlalu).
Uma wenza isiphetho esifushane, kulesi sigaba, intombazane izovumela ukuvuthwa, ukuthola ukuqondisa kanye nokuqiniseka ukuthi kunowesifazane, yize kuyilapho kunesimo esiningi esihlokweni sengqondo esivuthiwe ngokwesimo esivuthiwe imvelo yethu.
Ingxenye yesibili yokulala yokuthi ungaba kanjani ngowesifazane phakathi kwabesilisa. I-heroine iqala ngalokho okuxoxa ngayo namadoda, angenakuba nabo. Aze amemezele umbhalo osendaweni yakhe ezungezile uzokuqonda imvelo yawo.
Ukuxhumana nabantu, angabona ukuthi banolaka, ubuwula, behlukile. Kubalulekile emfanekisweni womyeni, ngoba izehlakalo ezesabekayo zenzeka naye, emva kwalokho ama-heroine athi usendaweni yawo.
Mhlawumbe, umyalezo oyinhloko ukuthi i-heroine idlulisela ukwakheka kwayo njengowesifazane, kepha ayikwazi ukusebenzisa amandla wobuntu bakhe nobulili bayo kuphela, kodwa kuphela "endaweni yayo", eduze kwendoda.
Futhi, ukulala kungabhekwa kumongo weqiniso lokuthi ubulili nobufeni, ngakolunye uhlangothi, okuthile okumsulwa, amasiko, okukhethekile (isithombe seSonto). Futhi ngakolunye - ukuhlukumeza, kwemvelo, ukuziphatha okunengqondo (izithombe zenkampani, imidlalo kanye nokulwa okudakiwe).
Mhlawumbe iphupho liveza ukuthi ibhalansi ayikatholakali emphefumulweni phakathi kwalezi zinkolelo eziningi.
Kuthiwani ngamaphupho akho? Thumela izindaba zakho ku-: [email protected] ngamaphutha "amaphupho".
Sizobonana maduze!
UMaria Zemskova, udokotela wezengqondo, udokotela wezengqondo womndeni kanye nokuqeqeshwa okuholayo kokukhula komuntu siqu kweSikhungo Sokuhweba uMarika Hazin.