Umsebenzi oyinhloko wabantu abaningi - "Dala umndeni futhi uzoba yinjabulo" - uvame ukwephula edwaleni langempela, ukungakwazi ukubheka ukuyekethisa nokuxoxisana ngezinto ezibalulekile, ezijabulisayo, eziyisisekelo ngaphambi kokukhahlela kwendandatho emunweni.
Umndeni akuwona umsebenzi onzima, lapho udinga khona ukuguqulwa lapho kuvela khona imizamo. Lokhu kungumnikelo ofanayo wezingane ezimbili, kuyinto yokuthandana (hhayi kuphela isikhathi se-bakery-uswidi, lapho indoda inaka umfazi, nesimo sengqondo sobudlelwano).
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Ngesikhathi sezindlu, kwakukuhle, kumnandi, kuzolile.
Ngakho-ke bobabili babejabule.
Ukuze ungenzeki ezimweni lapho "izinqama ezimbili emgwaqweni wezintaba".
Kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuthi ngokuphelele bonke ubudlelwano budlula ngezigaba nezinkinga eziyinkimbinkimbi. Umehluko kuphela ukuthi lo mbhangqwana uphendula kanjani ebunzimeni - Omunye ugijimela ebunzimeni bokuqala, othile ufuna izindlela zekhambi elinobungani bemvelo, kodwa futhi uzoba nalokho ngangokunokwenzeka.
Isazi sezengqondo u-Alena al-As
Izikhathi ezinzima kakhulu ebudlelwaneni bomndeni zingunyaka wokuqala, owesithathu, wesikhombisa noweshumi nane . Kulezi zikhathi ukuthi zinezinkinga zobunzima, futhi isifiso sokuxazulula ngokushesha yonke isehlukaniso sikhulu.
Ngonyaka wokuqala wempilo yomndeni Izithandani zivame ukungqubuzana, njengoba kwenzeka lesi sigaba sokuqalisa.
Kuvela izinkinga ngenxa:
- Life. Kuyavela ukuthi ayithandi uswidi, ehlakazeke endlini, ithambeke lakhe, amasokisi angcolile ngaphansi kombhede. Indoda iskena itiye elikhulu, ithatha amazinyo ayo ngemfoloko futhi idle izandla epanini lokuthosa. Futhi, okubi kakhulu, kudinga imfoloko kule pan yokuthosa.
Ukusuka ngaphandle kubonakala sengathi zonke lezi zingamanje, kepha abantu abajwayele baphila ngendlela ethile (ukulahla i-phantom ngokushesha, engeza izigqoko ezingcolile kubhasikidi), kanzima kakhulu kwakhiwa kabusha.
Uma lokhu kuyinkinga yakho, hlukanisa imisebenzi yasekhaya, hlela imiyalo yokulayisha (lapho bobabili bezinqwaba emikhawulweni yokuqonda kwakho, bese usebenza ngokubambisana), omunye nomunye akayona;
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-okulindelwe ngokweqile . Lapho lona wesifazane elindele inkosana, futhi umgibeli wambamba, futhi wanquma ukuthi "kungani kungenjalo", bayohlushwa yikho konke, ngaphandle kwenkosana. Ngoba into enzima kunazo zonke ukuphuma ekukhohlisweni kwakho futhi yasungula ukuthula nangokweqiniso, impilo yakho, kumlingani wakho.
Uma le nkinga ikuthinte, bheka indoda yakho ngobunono futhi uzibuze imibuzo embalwa. "Uma ngizohlangana nesigidigidi kulayini wesinkwa, ngizobe ngiyihlukumeza umyeni wami?", Iziphi izici ezinhle ezinazo? "," Engingakwazi ukukubekezelela? ";
- Awukho umuzwa . Lapho "uShiki Tikali" futhi "Zonke izintombi sezishadile, mina sibi?" Emshadweni, izinto ezimbi ziqala ukwenzeka. Ngoba noswidi futhi iqiniso lokuthi umyeni akayona intombazane, ungaba ngcono, uthole indawo yokuhlala futhi wamukele okuwukuphela kwecala lapho uthanda indoda.
Futhi lapho ama-cavalier evele aphenduka, owabiza washada futhi enoni ukuthi angaphumi, wabe esephuma ukuthi akaphelele .... konke, impilo izoba yisihogo.
Uma uqonda ukuthi empeleni awumthandi umlingani futhi, ngaphezu kwalokho, awunayo imizwa efudumele, inhlonipho, uzwela, uma uzizwa kabi, khona-ke lobu budlelwano kumele buqediwe.
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Isigaba esilandelayo senhlekelele siwukugubha iminyaka engu-3 yomndeni. Imvamisa ubudlelwano ngalesi sikhathi buzinzile, buthule, uswidi akekho ophonsa. Ukukhula kobudlelwano futhi, ngasikhathi sinye kuvela Izizathu ezintsha zezingxabano:
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- Imvamisa ngalesi sikhathi, lo mbhangqwana uza ezandleni zakhe nengane. Owesifazane unikeza wonke amandla enganeni, ekhathala, alwele umzuzu wamahhala futhi azama ukuhlala nowesifazane wakhe othandekayo nobefisa ukuba ngumyeni wakhe.
Akusebenzi ngaso sonke isikhathi, ikakhulukazi uma umyeni enezimfuneko ezeqile kanye nezintambo ze-zero ukuhlukanisa imisebenzi.
Isixazululo esingaphezulu: Indoda ezofakwa kakhulu empilweni yengane, ukuyinakekela, futhi lona wesifazane akadlali i-heroine ezokwazi ukubhekana naye;
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- Izinkinga empilweni yezocansi . Kuba yisicefe, Presno, hhayi ngaphambili. Konke okwengeziwe kweminyaka yokuqala kuzonyamalala, izidingo eziyisisekelo, njengokulala.
Isibonelo, uma bekusetshenziselwa ukunganakwa ngephupho nokuphumula kwakhe ngenxa yobusuku obushisayo, manje sekuvele ukulala, kubonakala kubonakale kanjalo.
Uma uqonda ukuthi inkinga ilele kuyo, ungesabi ukuguqula impilo yakho yocansi nokunikela, khuluma, wabelane ngemibono yakho, uncike izibopho zothuli;
- Izingxabano zezezimali . Kuyadingeka ukuchitha imali ngezidingo zomndeni, ukuze uziphikise entweni ethile, ukukhokha imali mboleko / ukubolekwa, okuthinta ngokuqinile ukuqina kwengqondo komuntu.
Uma inkinga yomndeni wakho ikulesi, khona-ke kufanele ukhiphe ulwazi lokufunda kanye nemithwalo yemfanelo (amabhange ezingulube, amadiphozithi, uhlu, hhayi ukuthenga okungazelelwe "bengifuna").
Ukucabanga kabusha kwempilo, izinto eziza kuqala kanye namagugu, ubunzima bangaphakathi lobuntu - konke lokhu kuyingxenye yenkinga yomndeni elandelayo eyenzeka kuyo Iminyaka engu-7 yokuhlala ndawonye.
Imvamisa, lo mbhangqwana ubhekene nenkinga eyodwa enkulu - lokhu akukuqondi ukuthi yini okufanele uyenze ngokulandelayo. Ingane yaya esikoleni, owesibili angifuni noma cha, umsebenzi uzinze, zonke izingxabano nezimpikiswano zikhubekile, futhi konke kuhleliwe.
Imvamisa, le nkinga ibizwa ngokuthi yinkulumo elula ethi "Yini eyayilahlekile?".
Futhi hhayi imizwa eyanele nokuqonda ukuthi yini okufanele uyenze ngokulandelayo.
Azikho izinhloso nokugqugquzelwa.
Akukho ukunakwa ngokwanele kusuka kumlingani futhi ufuna ukuthakazelisa futhi ufiseki hhayi kuye kuphela, kodwa futhi "futhi" ukungena "nemizwelo elahlekile kwabanye.
Imvamisa kukhona i-nostalgia yempilo yomkhombe kanye nomuzwa wokuthi konke kuhamba kahle futhi kumnandi lapho, manje obulawayo oyisidina.
Kuyadingeka ukuxazulula le nkinga ngokufanele futhi kancane kancane: Ukunaka wena kanye nobudlelwano, hlela umlingani wesibili wesithandwa bese unaka kakhulu umlingani, ngoba yile, akwanele kulesi sigaba sobudlelwano.
Unyaka weshumi nane wobudlelwano bomndeni Ungashada ngokuthi "ubungane nomkakhe / umyeni wakhe".
Izingane zikhule, kepha zisadinga abazali abasaqala ukuhlukana nokubukwa kwabo (izingane - Intsha - Intsha, kanye nabanye abazali bayo babheka ubuhlobo nengane kule nkathi enzima), ukuqhubeka nokuqeqeshwa.
Impilo esondele kakhulu ithuthelwe emuva emuva futhi konke okungukuthi - kunalokho isikweletu somshado kunesifiso nesidingo.
Abalingani bazwe abangane abaningi nabangane abahle kunombhangqwana futhi ngenxa yalokho bahlukanisa omunye nomunye ngenxa yokungalingani ekuzwisiseni ubudlelwano.
Kulesi sikhathi sokuthi ungathandana nomlingani wakho futhi: ukujika iminyaka edlule, khumbula into ebaluleke kakhulu futhi ebaluleke kakhulu eyenzekile, ngiyabonga ngenhlamvu eqinile noma ingemuva elinokwethenjelwa. Bhobisa ndawonye ohambweni, qabula ngemuva komsebenzi noma ekuseni, futhi uvumele izingane ngokwazo zinqume ukuthi zizofunda kuphi nokuthi ziphile kanjani.
Ukuxazululwa kwezinkinga zomndeni akulula futhi kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuthi umuntu oyedwa akakwazi ukwenza konke ukuze emkhayeni kwakukhona uthando, ukuthula nokuzwana nokuzwana nokuthula. Ngaphambi kokuphula ubuhlobo, bobabili kufanele bazame ukulenza wonke amandla okusindisa futhi angangabazi impilo esele ngesinqumo esisheshayo.
Ukuqhekeka - ungakha. Mhlawumbe ungaphuthumi?