Njengomthetho, lapho umhlangano nomuntu, esithandana naye ngokuhlanya, siqala ukuziphatha ngokwemvelo yonke into ejabule - futhi, akuseyona nkulumo yokuheha isifiso sendoda.
Ukuze uthole into isifiso sakho sokukunaka, siphakamisa ukuthi uzame lolu hlelo olulandelayo lwesenzo esakhiwe yi-American Psychologist edumile e-60s. Ake siqale.
Ubani ongeke athi, ukubukeka kubalulekile
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Ukumamatheka
Ubuwazi ukuthi emikhondweni yokuqala indoda idonsela ukunakwa hhayi kangako kwezinye izingxenye zomzimba wakho, malini ukumamatheka kwakho? Ngomqondo othile, uthando luvela ekuqaleni nje, kodwa kusukela kumamatheka lokuqala, njengoba amadoda angaphezu kuka-1000 akhombisa ukuvota. Kodwa-ke, akufanele umamatheke njalo: Ungakha umbono ongalungile ngawe.
Naka ukubukeka kwakho
Yebo, umhlaba wangaphakathi ubalulekile, kepha indoda isafanele ukuthola, kepha inqobo nje uma umsebenzi wakho ukwenza ube nentshisekelo kunoma iyiphi inzalo. Ezingeni lokuqonda, indoda ithatha imizuzu embalwa nje ukuyiqonda, ukubizela wena isifiso noma cha. Ngaphezu kwalokho, iningi lamadoda lavuma ukuthi inhlanzeko yomuntu siqu lapho ebona owesifazane edlala indima encane kunokugqoka noma ukugqoka okuhle.
Ungakhohlwa ngokuxhumana okubonakalayo
Akukho lutho oluhle kakhulu kunowesifazane ozethembayo. Lapho nje uhlala phansi ukukhuluma, ungafihli amehlo, ungabheki phansi. Ukuthandwa kwabesilisa lapho intombazane ihola ingxoxo eqiniseka futhi angesabi ukuxhumana okubonakalayo.
Zama ukukhiphe umkhathi
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Bukela ukuthi usho kanjani
Akubona bonke abesifazane abalethwa ukuzalwa nge-velvet tempo, kepha akukho okukuvimbela ukuthi ufunde ukuphatha izwi lakho ukuze ungabingeli ubutha kumlingani ongaba khona. Hhayi nje kuphela abesifazane abathanda izindlebe: Amadoda awenzi mancane amathuba okuthi alahlekelwe amakhanda avela kwizwi lowesifazane elibukekayo. Kungani ungakubheki lo mbono?
Khohlwa ngocingo
Akukho lutho olucasulayo ukwedlula i-interlocutor, ephazanyiswe njalo ngocingo oludlikizayo. Impela izintombi zakho zingalinda uze ubuye nosuku ubatshele bonke. Kepha ngesikhathi sokuxhumana, zama ukungahloli inethiwekhi yokuxhumana nabantu futhi uxwayise ngokujwayelekile ngaphambi kokuthi umatasa nalobusuku.
konke kusezandleni zakho
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Amahlaya ukukusiza
Awukho umuzwa wokuhlekisa, kepha nokho umuntu uthandeka kakhulu ukuxhumana nomlingani ongakhipha lesi simo. Vumelana, ngomhlangano wokuqala, amavoluti ezinhlangothini zombili mane avele. Kepha noma kunjalo, lapho uzama ukuhlekisa, zama ukungathinti i-interlocutor yakho noma abanye, ngoba anazi ukuthi awukwazi ukusabela kanjani kwakho, kubonakala sengathi, ihlaya elingenabungozi.