Bazali, abantwana nemali: Indlela yokwenza umntwana emntwaneni?

Anonim

Umntu ongenabantu ngokungathandabuzekiyo, imithetho yalo enzima. Ukuba ngabazali, sizama ukubalungiselela oku, ukufundisa ngokuzithemba ukuya phambili, ukufezekisa impumelelo. Akukho mfihlo yokuba icandelo elibalulekileyo lobomi bomdala yimali. Izinto ezidlala indima, indlela yokuzifumana ngayo, indlela yokuchitha - ngayo yonke into ngayo abantwana bethu ziya kufunda kuthi kubazali babo. Sifundisa abantwana ukuba baphathe imali, bagcine kwaye bachitha, babe sisidenge okanye sinesisa. Ukunika imali kwiindleko zepokotho, sinokwandisa ukuzithemba kwabo, sisomeleza imeko okanye, ngokuchasene, sihlaze, sibonisa ukuba sinayo yonke into, kwaye abanayo into. Ngamanye amagama, imali yile, kwelinye icala, elona candelo libalulekileyo lobomi babantu abadala, olwamkelwa malunga nosapho, kwaye kwelinye - isixhobo esinamandla sokukhulisa abantwana abafuna ukuba bakwazi ukwenza ngokufanelekileyo sebenzisa.

Ngokwenza umntwana isipho, siye samfundisa nesifundo sobomi. Oko kuxhomekeke kuthi. Ngoncedo lwesipho, unokukholisa umntwana, yinike ithuba elitsha lokukhulisa, ukuphuhlisa, kwaye kunokwenzeka ukwenzakalisa, ukudala ubunzima obuninzi kwixa elizayo. I-American Psychotherapist ye-American Psychotherapist Cl Madibanes inika ingqalelo enomdla malunga noku. Ngokusekwe kubo, ndizisa icebiso eliqela:

1. Kubalulekile ukuba uqonde ukuba zeziphi izinto ezinokwenziwayo emntwaneni, zimenzela isipho, kwaye oko kuya kubandakanya oko. Rhoqo sinika izinto ezinje, enkosi apho abantwana bethu bavela khona iimfuno ezintsha. Umzekelo, ekufumaneni unodoli, intombazana iya kufuna iimpahla ngale doll, izitya, indlu enefenitshala njalo njalo. Okanye, ukuhambisa ibhayisekile yosuku lokuzalwa, sibethelela ukuthanda umdlalo, indlela yokuphila esebenzayo, ephuhlisa ngokuqinisekileyo. Kodwa kwangaxeshanye, kwixesha elizayo, isidingo sobuncinci besixhobo sebhayisikile siya kuvela kwixesha elizayo, kwaye siphezulu kwibhayisekile entsha, egqibeleleyo ngakumbi. Kubalulekile ukuthatha ezi mfuno zibalulekileyo, ukuqonda ukuba ziluncedo njani, asikulungele.

2. Musa ukunika ukukhetha. Rhoqo abazali banika umntwana into ebalulekileyo kwaye ixabisekile kuye, umzekelo, ibhayisekile efanayo okanye nesilwanyana sasekhaya okanye nesipho, sithathe esi sipho. Okanye isoyikiso kukuba bakrazule, ngaloo ndlela bacinezela indlela yokuziphatha komntwana. Ukuba oku kuyenzeka rhoqo, kukho ityala elininzi kunye nokuxinana phakathi kwabazali nomntwana, ngokuqinisekileyo okwenzeka ubudlelwane. Umntwana kufuneka azi ngokucacileyo ukuba yintoni le yeye-abazali, kwaye yintoni eqhelekileyo kusapho lonke.

3. Ukwenza isipho, kuphephe ukohlwaya. Unokunika isipho kwaye uthi amazwi amahle, ngaloo ndlela adale umntu, kwaye unokongeza inxalenye yobukrakra kwaye ungathandekiyo kwisipho esixabisekileyo. Umzekelo, xa uBawo ebiza nonyana xa ebafaka kubahlobo bakhe - le nto ililungelo elikhulu ngaye, kodwa ukuba uyamohlwaya esidlangalaleni ngale ndlela yokuloba - le sele ihlatywe. Isipho kufuneka sinoyolo umntu, singanxulunyaniswa nehlazo nehlazo.

4. Musa ukusebenzisa imali ukwenzela ukufundisa isifundo. Apha ndithetha ukuba hayi iimeko xa impumelelo ivuzwa ngemali. Imalunga nomnqweno wokufundisa okuthile ngemali. Khawufane ucinge ngale meko: Umama uthembisa ingubo yentombi esebenzisa isidanga kwiiruble ezingama-30,000, ukuba ugqiba isikolo ngaphandle kophithiphepha. Intombi izama ngalo lonke ixesha lakhe kwaye ifumane amabakala amahle. Emva koko, ufumana ingubo yakhe ephupheyo, kodwa ibe ngama-35 mangama-35,000, uza kunina ngemihlali, kwaye uthi: "Hayi, ndingasakuniki." Intombazana emfihlekweni evela kuMama igcina imali kwiindleko zepokotho, ihlala nabahlobo kwaye ekugqibeleni ithenga ingubo enqwenelekayo. Umama ucinga ukuba wamnika umntwana isifundo, wabonisa umzekelo wokuqeqesha okuhle, wabonisa ukuba kubalulekile ukubambisa izithembiso, kwaye eneneni wayefunda ukusincama nobuxoki.

Kuzo zonke iimeko ezichazwe apha ngasentla, - xa sisenza iimfuno ezingeyomfuneko, zinike, kwaye ke sikhethe, ukohlwaywa ngokwenza isipho-sitsalela umnxeba umntwana imvakalelo enzulu yengqumbo, ethi Kunzima kakhulu ukuba boyise. Umntwana okhubekisayo ngumntu oxhomekekileyo, kuba wakhubeka ihlala iwela ekuxhomekekeni kwengqondo kumntu owonileyo. Ke sinokumphazamisa umntwana ukuba akhule.

Ukwazi ezi meko, kubalulekile ukuba uzilandele, ungathinteli uphuhliso lwenkcubeko yabantwana bethu, zincede zikhule kwaye zizithembe kwaye zizimele kwaye zizimele kwaye zizithembe. Ke siza kwenza okwethu, kwaye ubomi babo bonwabile;)

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