Kwindawo yokwamkelwa kwezengqondo, abazali abajamelana nokungaqondi komntwana wabo beza nezikhalazo ukuba abantwana babo akukho lula, bengaqondakali kwaye banzima. Akumangalisi ke ngoko ukuba intetho endala ithi umntwana okhulileyo, iingxaki ezinkulu ezinaye. I-Psychologlogy kunye ne-Divedagog ichaza iminyaka yobudala. Esi sisikhokelo sobudala ukusuka kwiminyaka eli-10 ukuya kweli-15. Ngeli xesha, umzimba womntwana utshintsha ngokukhawuleza, ukungena ngexesha lokukhuliswa kunxulunyaniswa nothuso olunzulu lomzimba kunye nengqondo. Umqondiso oqhelekileyo weminyaka yotshintsho ayihambelani. Umntwana ohlamba umntwana wakho wehlambulokazi, ngovuyo oqhelene nabantu oqhelileyo, ukunxibelelana nobunzima babantu, emva koko uvala, uphendula kumbuzo. NgoMvulo, uyaqiniseka ngokupheleleyo kwi-geniyas yakhe, eza koyisa iHarvard, nangoLwesine obandezelekayo ngenxa yokuqonda kwakhe oqhelekileyo kwaye ukungakwazi ukwenza into eqaqambileyo. Nika ingqalelo kwinani lezinto eziya kukuvumela ukuba uqonde ukuba umntwana wakho ungene kwithuba lokukhula:
-U-EGeceriction, uhambelana nenyaniso yokuba iingxaki zabo zeshumi elivisayo ziphambili. Akanamdla koko kusenzeka khona. Nantsi i-pimple entsha kwi-chin okanye i-oblique jonga umntu ofunda naye esikalini sentlekele yendalo iphela.
-Umntwana okwishumi elivisayo wenza izicwangciso ze-NAPOELE. Oku kuthetha ukuba sele eyazi ukuba uza kufumana njani isigidi sakhe sokuqala, ngelixa i-hike isonka ayibalulekanga kuye.
-Ukwishumi elivisayo kuhle ukuziva upholile, kunjalo, ngenkani nenkuthalo. Ke, umntwana okwishumi elivisayo usukela kwiimpawu ezinje ngokwenza inkululeko kunye nenkululeko.
-Ukuzonwabisa ukuba inkungu ayibi mbi ngakumbi kune-hormones evuthiweyo.
I-Pixabay.com.
Kweli xesha linzima, abazali babaluleke kakhulu ukuba bangangeni ekuziphatheni izinto zokuziphatha, okanye bangaweli kolunye unxibelelwano olugqithisileyo nomntwana. Kucacile ukuba iingxabano rhoqo kunye nongcikivo akunguye kuphela umntwana, kodwa kunye nabazali. Kodwa akufuneki ukuba "ukuqhubela phambili" ubomi bam, ndizisa unxibelelwano kwizinto zasekhaya, "kwisuphu etafileni", "ndiza kuzisa inkunkuma" njalo njalo. Musa ukunikezela kwiinkanuko, khumbula ukuba umntwana kule minyaka, nangona wayengazithandiyo ukungazithandi abantu abadala, kufuneka bafumane uthando kunye nokuvunywa. Ukungazinzi kwe-psyche, ukungangqinelani kokuziphatha yimaski nje. Inkxaso kunye nokuvunywa kwabadala kuyimfuneko komnye umntu omncinci. Khumbula ukuba ukukhukhumala kunye nokhukuliseko kubonakala, ngaphakathi komntwana ofikisayo kuhlala kuziva ngokungazithembi kunye noloyiko.
Siza kuhlalutya inani lamatyala afanelekileyo kwaye sizame ukubonelela ngeendlela ezininzi eziya kukuvumela ukuba uqonde ngcono umntwana wakho okwishumi elivisayo.
Umntwana okwishumi elivisayo uqalisa ukungqubana nabazali bakhe, ethandabuza igunya labo. Oku kungenxa yokuba umntwana ofikisayo uba nguontanga, kuyamkelwa kweli xesha ukuba liyintloko yekona. Umzali oqondayo, kufuneka azi ukuba ukuze umntwana wabo azixabise iingcebiso zabahlobo abavela esitratweni, kwaye ezabo, kufuneka ube ngumzekelo. Zama ukwabelana nayo ngokuthandabuza kwakho, izicwangciso zekamva kwaye ngexesha uya kukuthembela ngakumbi. Ingxaki yobuxoki, ihlala yenzeka ekufikelweni, inakho kwaye inokuthi iconjululwe. Kodwa kufuneka iqondwe ukuba le yinkqubo ende. Abazali bafanele bathathele ingqalelo isicwangciso sabo sokuziphatha. Mhlawumbi impendulo enesaqhwithi kwiimpazamo ezincinci zomntwana okwishumi elivisayo kwenzeka. Ikhuselwe yi-squll yeemvakalelo kunye nokuziphatha. Kulula ukuba anike iimpendulo othandekayo kunina okanye utata wakhe. Yiba ngonyamezelo, nokuba ubona ubuxoki. Khumbula ukuba ulutsha luyathanda ukuphupha. Uburharha bufihlakeleyo akufuneki bubonakaliswe kokungazithembi. Unobangela wokuziphatha gwenxa kufuneka kufunwe ngombindiso woqwalaselo kunye nomnqweno wokubonisa ukwamkelwa kwabo. Umntwana ofikisayo kufuneka azive oko bamphatha njengelingane ngokwabo. Kubalulekile ukudlulisela kwindoda ethambileyo yokuba uburharha bungabonakalisi ukuba badala. Umkhethwa unoxanduva ngezenzo zabo. Ukusinda iminyaka yotshintsho yomntwana wakho kuya kuba lula ukuba uyakukhumbula ukuba ngaphandle kwazo zonke iingxaki, abantwana bethu zezona zinto zibalaseleyo emhlabeni. Thanda nje kwaye uyayixabisa into yokuba ungumntwana wakho.