Ukungcatshwa kwendoda ayisiyiyo kuphela ingcambu. Kuluhlu olungezantsi, kukho iintlobo ngeentlobo zeengxaki kubudlelwane bamadoda nabafazi, kodwa bonke banokuchazwa kwigama elinye - ukungcatsha. Ukuba enye okanye amanqaku angaphezulu koluhlu afanelekile ukuba inkcazo yeengxaki kubudlelwane bakho, ke esona sisombululo sisona siya kuba sekutheleni iqabane. Uluhlu lwenziwe kwi-psychologistrist yengqondo yaseGalina Yanka.
Ganko
Ubuhlobo phakathi komgangatho
Ubudlelwane be-platonic, obizwa ngokuba ngumhlobo, banokuba namaxesha amnandi kakhulu. Unxibelelwano yinto eqhelekileyo ngokupheleleyo, kodwa kuvunyelwe phi umphetho? Incoko yasebusuku, amagumbi okuncokola, nokuba akukho lwalamano lusenyongweni phakathi kwabahlobo kwaye ababelani ngebhedi, umhlobo kunye nentombi banokwabelana ngobomi, kubandakanya nezenzo zakho. Xa ethengisa iimfihlo ngamaqabane-kungenxa yezinto, kodwa umbuzo ophilayo ungazalelwa entlokweni yakho: "Kutheni le nto inye ibhinqa limele lazi amaxesha am?" Ubudlelwane obunobuhlobo akufuneki boyikise, kodwa ukuvezwa kolwazi lomntu kunye nokuqwalaselwa kakhulu kumfazi womnye umntu ukuba ungumfanekiso ongathandekiyo.
Ubuxoki
Ubuxoki bayakwazi ukutshabalalisa naluphi na ulwalamano. Iimfihlo, ukungafezeki, ubuxoki bosindiso-konke oku kutshabalalisa ubudlelwane obunyanisekileyo phakathi kwabantu. Ukunyaniseka-Yintoni ekufuneka yenziwe phakathi kwabantu, uthando oludibeneyo okanye ubuhlobo. Kungekudala, ubuxoki buya kuba buyinyaniso, nokuba oku akwenzeki, umngcipheko omkhulu kakhulu. Xa yonke imfihlelo iya kuba ngumhlathi, iqabane elilahlekileyo liya kufumana iintlungu, ukuba lixhoba lokungcatsha. Ukuba uqaphela ukuba le ndoda inesifo esinganyangekiyo, mhlawumbi ufuna uncedo nenkxaso yakho, kwaye ngenxa yobuxoki, ukwenzakala kwabantwana, ukungakhathali okanye ukohlwaywa okuqhubekayo. Mhlawumbi njengomntwana, kwafuneka enze ubunyani.
Ubuxoki bayakwazi ukutshabalalisa naluphi na ubudlelwane
Ifoto: HARTAHH.USPUS.com.
Ikhawuntara yobuhlobo
Khumbula xa sasincinci, abanye abantwana bamanyene eManyano kwaye baqala ukuba ngabahlobo nxamnye nabanye. Ke umntu ongenakuvumelana neqabane okanye ebonisa nje ulwazi olupheleleyo ngentlonipho, uqala ukukhangela inkxaso phakathi kwabanye. Indoda inokuqalisa ukukhangela abantu abanengqondo efanayo phakathi kosapho kunye nabahlobo bakhe. Kwenzeka ukuba ikhule kuhlaselo rhoqo, kwaye abadli baphambene ngedini lamabango eelitha, kwaye ixhoba, okwangoku, akukho ndawo yokujonga inkxaso. Ngamaxesha anje, kubalulekile ukuzikhusela, ethathela ingqalelo isakhelo, ukuba indoda iwele nxamnye nawe nelinye lamalungu osapho lwakhe. Indoda esondeleyo, ingakumbi indoda, kufuneka ikunike inkxaso, kuya kufuneka uzive ukhuselekile kwaye uye kuye, ungene kwimeko yoxinzelelo. Ngenxa yokuziphatha okunjalo kulele ngokungazithembi ngokupheleleyo kubo, kwakhona, umzekelo omkhulu uya kuba ngabantwana abancinci kunye neshumi elivisayo abahlala bebaxelela abazali ngokuziphatha kakubi kwabahlobo kunye nabo eklasini bajonge ngaphezulu emehlweni abo kunye notata.
Ukulungelelanisa nosapho, abahlobo kunye nemali
Ngayiphi na indlela, kukho ubuqhophololo omnye okanye olunye ubonakaliso, kunzima ukwenza ngaphandle kwawo. Akusoloko kubi ukuba abantu abazami ukuxhaphaza izinto ezinzulu xa ubuqhetseba buguqukela ekubeni lusongelo. Izibini ezitshatileyo kunye namaqabane akwixesha elide, ubudlelwane obusondeleyo buhlala buhlala bunye kwingxabano ngenjongo. Ukunyangwa ngokweemvakalelo emva kwaye ngexesha lokuxabana kunqabile kuzisa ulwaneliseko ngabathathi-nxaxheba bayo, nangona kuyenzeka ngaphandle. Ngokwesiqhelo le yiskripthi apho umfazi eqalayo ukulila, ukuqokelela izinto, okanye indoda ikhala kwaye igqabi-onke la magqabi. Ukungcatshwa kunokuthathwa njengemigqwetha yenkani. Umzekelo, ngenxa yokuthobela ukuthanda kwakhe, indoda isebenzisa abahlobo okanye usapho njenge-lever. Kukho izinto, ngokuqinisekileyo, azinakusetyenziswa ngokuchaseneyo.
Inani elikhulu leemfihlo
Kwenzeka ukuba ufunde ngeendaba ezibalulekileyo, enye indlela okanye enye ehambelana nomyeni wakhe, kwaye ubuze umbuzo wokuba kutheni engakuxelelanga nto ngayo? Iimfihlo zilungile, zinomntu wonke. Into oyithethayo intombi, awusoze uxelele umyeni wakhe okanye umfana. Kukho umahluko phakathi kokuthandabuza ukuvula (luhlobo luni lothando esinokuthetha ngaso?) Kunye nokupheliswa kwesiqhelo kolwazi olukhoyo. Khumbula isiko lentembeko njengesiseko semvisiswano kusapho.