Kunzwisisa kwakawanda kwemanzwiro avo, manzwiro uye kugona kubata, iyo yakakura mukana wekuwana zvinangwa zvinodiwa uye kuwana kugutsikana kubva muhupenyu hwako.
Rusununguko rwakawanda rwekusarudza, munhu akabudirira kwazvo munhu ari kuitwa. Kana izvi zvisiri, saka ari kutambudzika zvachose kuupenyu, dzimwe nguva asingatomboonzwisisa izvo zvakakonzerwa nenhamo yake. Sekureva kwepfungwa, munyaradzi wekurapa Sayenzi, hunhu hwehurumende, iyo munhu weInstitute of inobatanidzwa Psychoterapy Psychoterapy Psychotrapy Psychotive, chimwe chezvikonzero zvikuru zvekutadza kwedu kusarudzika kusinganzwisisike.
- Olga, zvinokwanisika here kutaura kuti chimwe chezvinhu zvikuru zvinokonzeresa zvekusakwanisa kuverenga kwepfungwa hazvisi zvavasina kuzadzikiswa? Pane kubatana pakati peichi here?
- Kune zvakajeka kwazvo. Hapana chakaipa mune zvishuvo. Chii Chinangwa? Uku ndiko kutaura kwemunhu kuhupenyu, chishuwo chekuzadzisa chimwe chinhu, chakamirira kubva kuhupenyu hwevamwe. Asi kana munhu asingagamuchire izvi, zvishuvo zvake zvinoshanduka kuita chimwe chinhu chinorwadza, chisina kugadzikana. Iwe unofanirwa kutsvaga chikonzero nei zvakaitika. Nei paine zvataurwa, uye hunyanzvi uye maitiro kuti uwane chinangwa cheset.
Mumwe nemumwe wedu ane mikana inogona kuve yemikana, iyi yakasarudzika yakasarudzika yemunhu mumwe nemumwe, uye izvi ingori zvekunyangadza zvekunyangadza - uku ndiko kunzwisisa kwemanzwiro pachayo, masimba ayo uye kushaya simba.
Semuenzaniso, kana ndikazvimiririra puranga kuti ndive chiremba anovhiya, nekuti hapana kutsungirira kwemuviri kwakadai, mukana wekumira kwemaawa masere patafura yekushandisa, uye kuisa puranga kuve chiremba anotungamira Munzvimbo ino - zvisina basa zvachose. Ndokusaka zvakakosha kuti uvimbe nezvesimba rako, ndeimwe yezviso zvekunyangadza zvekunyangadza, iwe unogona kuisa mapuranga akakwirira uye uwane ivo.
- Ini ndinofungidzira kuti vanhu vazhinji vanoteerera zvakanyanya ivo pachavo kuti vanzwisise zvavanonyatsoda muhupenyu. Hafu vanhu vanoita basa ravasingade vasina kufunga nezvazvo.
- Ini handina kumbobvira ndakaita manhamba akadaro, asi ndinoona kubva pakuita kwangu kuti vanhu vatambure zvakanyanya kubva pane zvavanoita kana zvikasazvinakidza, hazviverengere kana kuti zvakanyanyisa. Uye ivo vanoona kuti mumwe munhu anenge akasarudzika zvakanyanya kushanda, zvinoita kuti zvive nyore uye zviite kubudirira nekukurumidza. Naizvozvo, vanhu ava vanouya kwandiri kuzopa zano uye vabvunze mubvunzo uyu: "Ini handinzwisise kwekufamba kwekutama, ini handina simba, hapana chishuwo chekushanda." Ipapo tiri kukurukura, kuti munhu akaita sei kuti ave mugumo wakafa.
- Uye ndechipi chikonzero nei kazhinji kazhinji?
- Icho chikonzero ndechekuti kubva kuvabereki vekutanga vehudiki vanoisa zvigadziriso zvakajeka: izvo zvinonyanya kuitika, izvo zvakanaka, izvo zvakarurama. Vanhu ava, vasina kuzviteerera, vakawana imwe mhedzisiro, asi kutaura zvazviri, mufaro mukuru hauna kuedzwa.
Makumi matatu neshanu - makore makumi mana - Iri izera rine ngozi iro richangodurura rinopesana. Kana murume ari mudiki, zvinoita kunge iye kuti ave nenguva nenguva uye zvese zvichiri mikana. Nguva iri kuenda, hapana chinoitika, makore makumi mana ari kuswedera uye munhu anonzwisisa kuti iye iye amene haazotanga kutsvaka kubatsirwa, nekuti anonzwisisa kuti akazopindira uye ari kuita izvo zvaasingade. Uye zvakadii chaizvo kuti aite, aisanzwisisa, saka pane kugara uchigutsikana.
- Kana munhu asina kuzviwana aine pazera iro, pamwe anofanirwa kushandira kune imwe nzvimbo ine mwero uye kwete kutendeuka kubva mumusoro wake? Mushure mezvose, kuzvitsvaga hazvigone kuunza chero chinhu?
- Vanhu ava uye vanoshanda munzvimbo dzakadai mukutenda kwakanaka, mutoro, asi mubvunzo unonzwika sezvizvi: "Ndingararama sei uye kunakidzwa nebasa, kubva muhupenyu? Kurarama Kwaungaita Kuti Unzwe Kuravira kweHupenyu. "
- Haasi munhu wese anopiwa kuti ararame uye awane mufaro kubva muhupenyu, saka futero yakagadzira uye inofanirwa kutsungirira nayo. Iwe unofunga here kuravira kwehupenyu imamiriro ezvinhu?
- Ini ndinonzwisisa kusanzwisisa kwako, asi mamiriro acho anosungirwa. Zvinonzwika zvisina kujairika, nekuti nyanzvi dzepfungwa dzakangocherekedza kuti tsika yekutambura uye kudada nekutambura kwavo kwakafanana netsika yedu, mafungiro eRussia. Imwe neimwe tsika ine mamiriro ayo. Muchiitiko cheRussia pane nguva yekugara ichisingaperi - kusagutsikana muhupenyu. Muhuwandu, vanhu havaedzi kutsvaga chimwe chinhu, chimwe chinhu chokuchinja. Vanotambura, uye ivo vanotokwanisa kubatsirwa neizvi. Muchokwadi, ava vanhu vakasimba, asi kuda kwavo vanoshandiswa kuitira kuti varambe vari mumasochism.
MuBritish, semuenzaniso, imwe mamiriro ezvinhu, ivo vane simba uye kusvika vanhu mune izvi. Iyo French inowanzotenda kuti hupenyu hunongopihwa chete mafaro.
- Nei dambudziko rapfuura zvese? Nei munhu achirasikirwa nenjere kunzwa?
- Dambudziko rezvinoreva hupenyu rinoitika kana munhu akanzwisisa kuti haaite zvaari kuda kuita, uyezve anotanga kuputsa uye kupinza zvese munzira yake. Kurambana, kudzingwa, kurasikirwa nebhizinesi, shamwari. Ipapo anotanga kuvaka zvese kubva pakukanda, uye mushure mekunge zvese zvaunganidzwa zvakare, script inodzokororwa. Kupfuura zvese, chikonzero hachina kubviswa. Icho chikonzero ndicho kutya kwekugara sezvandinoda. Kunyange chikonzero chacho chisiri kubviswa, kutya kwevana hakushande, mamiriro ezvinhu akaoma kuchinja.
- Unoshanda sei pavari, pane tekinoroji? Mimwe mibvunzo inobvunza?
- Izvi zvinonzi kurambidzwa. Iko hakuna mibvunzo yakakosha, asi pane nheyo - yakajoinha yakadzika. Izvo zvinodikanwa kuti unzwisise izvo munhu anonzwa kuti nei achitya.
Nheyo yekushanda - kunzwira tsitsi, kunzwira tsitsi, kusikwa kwenzvimbo yekutsigira, mune yakadaro mubatanidzwa tinofambisa nhanho nekuenda kune chinangwa.
Dzimwe nguva munhu anotyisa chaizvo kutaura zvaanonzwa, kunyangwe zvake.
Basa revairapa ndere kugadzira denderedzwa revanhu vepedyo kubva kwaanogamuchira rubatsiro. Tsanangura kuti mutemo usingaperi uri kushanda muhupenyu hwepfungwa: Kana iwe uchida kuchinja chimwe chinhu muhupenyu hwako, wobva wachinja hunhu, zvaunoita zviito, manzwiro, anotanga kubereka maitiro matsva anozokubatsira nhasi. Uye mune izvi chete nyaya yekare ichadzoka.
- Iwe une hunyanzvi hwekukura muhukama here? Ndeipi nzira iyo inobvumira vakadzi vadiki kuvaka ramangwana, usatarisa munzvimbo? Zvine hukama nekunyora kwekunyora?
"Ini ndinoshanda nevanhu vane bhizinesi rakasimba uye nekuvimba ndinogona kutaura kuti basa remhuri yakasimba mubhizinesi uye rakakura kwazvo mubasa. Asi kuti vavake hukama hwakavimbika, zvakakosha kuti pasirese yekufambidzana nevanhu vasingafarire kuwirirana, uye vaigona kuve vakakwanisa kusiyanisa chinangwa chechokwadi uye vakagadzirira kuchinja.
Mumwe wevatengi vangu aive nehukama hwakanaka nejaya rakanaka nejaya, uye aive achinyepedzera nezve izvo ramangwana rakamirira. Musikana ane makore makumi maviri nematatu akazviona ari mumucheka wechena muchena nemucheto nemhete pamunwe.
Ndakamuraira kuti afunge nezvezvinangwa zveumwe wake, uye zvaive zvakamirira kushungurudzika. Ainge asiri kuzobatanidza hupenyu hwake naye, aingoda kushandisa nguva yake, aine mamiriro ezvinhu okubhadhara nzendo dzose, varaidzo yake yake uye haamanikidze kwaari.
Hapana kusaremekedza izvi, ivo vakangodaro vasina kuwirirana nezvinodiwa, uye zvakanyatsotaura kwaari zvaari kuda kubva kuhukama uhu. Kwaari, chokwadika, yaive mutambo. Akatora mazuva mashoma misodzi, nekuti kutaura zvakanaka kune kwavo kunyepedzera kwakaoma.
- Kana kuti pamwe wakakurumidza kuwana hukama?
- Iko hakuna kunaka, hukama hunogara uri mubvunzo wekukanganiswa. Munguva pfupi yakakurumidza kubvunza iyi mibvunzo, pakutanga akawana kuti munhu wacho haana kukodzera. Asi, chekutanga, iwe unofanirwa kunzwisisa kuti iwe unofanirwa kubva kune mumwe wako uye ungangoda kunyatsoda kuiswa kune hukama hwakakomba kuitira kuti urege kuoma.
Zvakatoipa zvichave kana iwe uchinzwisisa izvi, uye watove nepamuviri, ipapo pane kupwanyika kwakazara kweanopusa. Asi zvisati zvaitika ipapo pakanga paine zviratidzo zvakawanda zvekuvhiringidza, asi hatidi kufunga nezvazvo. Kwatiri, chinhu chikuru mufananidzo wakanaka uye zviroto. Uye pane zviratidzo nguva dzose.
- Ipa muenzaniso.
- Munhu haapindure mafoni, haafone kana uchitaurirana, haapindure mibvunzo nezvemibvunzo. Inozviita nenzira yarinokupa kusagadzikana, iwe unogoverana naye zvakaitika kwauri, uye haazviteerere, haatarwi kuve nenguva yako, nematambudziko ako. Pane zvakawanda zviratidzo, zvakakosha kuzvinzwa. Iri ndiro zita rekuchengeteka kwepamoyo.
- Zvinoita here kuti neimwe nzira inowedzera kuverenga kwako mupfungwa, pane mazano, maekisesaizi?
- chokwadi iwe unogona. Izvi zvinonyanya kuongororwa kwezuva, izvo zvakaitika nhasi zvawakafunga kuti waifunga nezveizvi. Wakaita zvese zvaunoda iwe zvauri kutya, izvo zvakanyara. Iwe unofanirwa kunyora maoni - zvinomutsa uye kudzidzisa munhu kuti urege kusiri pamabhenji ekunze, asi tarisa mukati mako. Inoshanda. Haufanire kungobvisa manzwiro ako, iwe unofanirwa kugadzirisa dambudziko.
Gara uchikurudzira vatengi vako kuti vanyore diary. Uye saka, zuva nezuva, vanhu vanodzidza. Panzvimbo pekuita zvinonyadzisa kuti iwe unoshandiswa uye kuti iwe wakaramba uchitungamira kuFiasco, iwe unongoda kumira uye kufunga chegumi.