Nigute ushobora kubona urukundo rwukuri ibintu byose kandi buriwese ashaka? Nta resept imwe. Urukundo Nyuma ya byose, afite umubano mwiza numufatanyabikorwa kandi, bidasanzwe bihagije, umubano na we.
Urukundo. Iyo ibisigo byahimbwe wenyine. Kandi bitererana ubushyuhe buturuka ku gitekerezo cy'umukunzi we. N'ibinyugunyugu mu gifu n'igihugu iyo amababa yiruka inyuma. Nibyo, gusa ibi byose ni physiologiya. Hormones ikina numugabo ufite urwenya. Amarangamutima mabi yose hamwe nibitekerezo byumvikana birahagarikwa. Kumva ibyishimo n'ibyishimo, "Kunda Euphoria" ukerekana hejuru. Ibi byose ni byiza kandi bitangaje, ariko gusa imiterere y'urukundo irashobora kumara igihe kirekire kure. Abakundana bakimara kubana, hari ubuzima rusange, inshingano, inshingano, abana bavutse, birangira. Kandi igihe cyo kwiga kuri mugenzi wawe kije.
Kubwibyo, niba udashaka gutandukana nuburyo bwurukundo, ariko ushaka kwibonera ibyo ukeneye, akamaro, guhorana ibitsina no gukundwa, ntukabe hamwe kandi ntukajye hamwe kandi ntukabyare abana. Kuki uzamura abana bakomeretse kandi bahura nimbaraga. Birashoboka cyane, urashobora kubaho kandi udafite ikizere, icyizere mugihe kizaza, nta bucuti bwo mumarangamutima, nta marangamutima nubwitonzi, witwa urukundo. KOMEZA MU RUKUNDO KANDI MU GIHE CYANYU, nshyire ahantu runaka, hariho undi muntu ukeneye rwose kandi afite agaciro. Niba atari ibyawe, noneho jya kure.
Iyo abakunzi babiri batangiye kubaho mu rukundo, ntabwo ari byiza gusa n'icyubahiro, ahubwo binatanga amakosa menshi bihinduka. Hano, uwambere gutenguha hamwe na leta yo kurakara bigaragara. Noneho hariho gushidikanya: kandi niba nihuta. Uracyafite umwanya wo guhunga murukundo, kuko "chimie y'urukundo" bitagikora. Kandi rero, nkuko byari bimeze mbere, ntibikiriho. Ibyo bihure byijimye byatakaye, nigihe cyo gutongana no gusobanura umubano bibaho. Umuntu wese ashaka ubuziranenge. Kandi gusobanukirwa nigice-cyambaye igice, kandi bakora ibyifuzo byose, kandi bitonderanye, kandi kwitaho buri gihe. Kumva ko ashaka kuvuga cyangwa gukeka icyo "izuba risobanutse", rigeze mu rugo. Kimwe na mama wawe ukunda. Niba aribyo. Niba kandi atari mu bwana bwa kure, umufatanyabikorwa ategekwa kabiri kubyumva no kugerageza, kuri babiri - we na mama, utajugunye ikintu. Kandi birashoboka ko hari byinshi kuburyo ntamuntu numwe ushobora kugereranya nayo. Hanyuma isi yose y'undi muntu igomba kuzenguruka indabyo nziza yimbara za Narcissa. Niba kandi atari byo, bivuze ko umufasha ari mubi kandi asabwa gusimburwa. Ibi byose nibyo abana bakeneye kandi ibitekerezo byabana kubyerekeye urukundo rwababyeyi ba societe cyangwa kubura, nacyo. Ibikorwa byubumwe bwiki gihe cyimibanire rimwe na rimwe ninshi cyane umuntu wabafatanyabikorwa ashobora gukurikiza cyangwa gufata mugihe kindi gihe. Ariko rero umwana azakura agatandukana numubyeyi, kuko agomba kuba ingimbi akuze kandi akajya mubuzima bwe kubitekerezo bye bishya. Kandi umuntu agumanye namarangamutima yamarangamutima yo guhangana nababyeyi wenyine nabo ubwabo mu bwigunge. Kandi birashoboka ko bimaze kubana nabana babo.
Iki nicyo gihe abashakanye batangiye kurwana no kugarura kandi bitera gutandukana. Kandi gushakisha umubano mushya, bishoboka cyane, bizarangira nabo. Cyangwa, ko umuntu mukuru, hamwe kuganira no kuvuga. Tangira ikindi kintu cyose. Hanyuma, birashoboka cyane, igihe cyo kwihangana kizaza.
Kubwibyo, niba ukomeje gufata umwanzuro wurukundo rwurukundo numuntu mukuru wo kubaka umubano, noneho urashaka cyangwa utabikora, ugomba kunyura mugihe cyo kubaka umubano numukunzi. Kandi batangirana no kurera ibibi bya bose. Kandi ahari ibibabaje cyane kumufatanyabikorwa, ntaho bihuriye nayo.
Kandi iyi niyo mbaho nyine iyo abashakanye baza kubufasha bwumwuga bwa psychologue. Kandi uhereye kuriyi ngingo ni kwiga no kutishimira kwabo gutangira. Kuki? he? Kwihanganira no gutegereza ko Saba ubwayo impinduka zidashoboka kandi zidatanga umusaruro. Nibibazo byihishe, kandi umutwaro wose wumubano wonyine ntushobora gutsinda. Ubwoko bumwe. Kwihangana - ntibisobanura kwihanganira.
Kwihangana bisobanura kwihanganira. Iyi niyo ntangiriro y'urukundo rwinshi. Hanyuma Egoism y'abana, nk'itegeko, yiganje muri leta: ntabwo yabonaga, ntiyigeze yumva, ntabwo yashimye, ntabwo yakiriye, sinkunda, i Tanga byinshi - Igihembo cyanjye kirihe? Na TD ... atangira guhindura umuntu. Ndabikubwiye, ni inzira igoye kandi igoye. Menya ibyo nizeraga kandi barabikora ndavuga na gato. Kandi kumenya kudatungana kwabo. Ubumenyi no kumenya - ibintu bitandukanye. N'ububabare buzaterwa ubwawe - kuruta ububabare bw'umubiri. Kandi ntabwo abantu bose, ndetse nubutwari nubutwari, birashoboye. Ariko iyi niyo nzira iganisha ku kuba hafi yayo no kuba hafi. Urashobora, birumvikana ko uhindure umufatanyabikorwa, ukagerageza nk'ikoti, abashakanye cyangwa imyaka icumi, hanyuma usige ibintu bitumvikana kandi bidashimishije. Ariko abantu bake cyane bazi ko igitsina atari urukundo, guceceka ntibisobanura - kubaha, no kurera ntaho bihuriye no kumenyekana ... gusa kwiga no kumva no "imico mibi" , bamaze kubakira, kubashakisha, shyira hano none, basubiza ibibazo byawe, kubera iki? - Kubijyanye na we no kubantu, guhitamo ibyifuzo byabo n'indangagaciro kandi biga umunezero n'ibyishimo kugirango dusangire ibyo ufite numufatanyabikorwa - kurikiza kure
Nyizera, uri hafi bihagije mugihe wifuza, ariko ntashobora kugukunda. Minisiteri ntabwo ari urukundo rwurukundo. Ubu ni bwo kwigaragaza cyane. Ndashaka kandi ntukabe kumwanya nanyemeje, ariko kubera ko nshaka. Kandi ntacyo ndasaba. Hano utangirana nibyishimo byibyishimo. Ariko urashobora kuza muriki gihe c'imibanire gusa unyuze abanza. Ibi ni ibyangombwa. Urukundo ntabwo ari kubintu runaka. Ntabwo ari amafaranga, ntabwo ari byiza. Amarangamutima nubushyuhe. Muguhana kimwe. Urukundo rugomba kwihibamo ubwabo muri bo no mu mukundana, ntitwibagirwe ko indangagaciro n'ibyo bakeneye ndetse no ku buryo bakunze kubaho, ugomba gukorera hamwe kandi ukeneye gukorera hamwe. Kandi buri wese ukwayo. Ubutaka muri trifles no gukora ibishya bishya kuri bibiri. Hanyuma byubahwa biragaragara. Kandi benshi babayeho mubuzima, bashyigikiwe, kwitonderana, hamwe no gusobanukirwa no kumenya ko hari umuntu nshobora kwizera, ahantu hegereye, hanyuma ikizere no gushimira. Kandi rero, hariho guhana imbaraga, ibyiyumvo, ibitekerezo ... kandi nibyanjye byose, biramenyerewe. Kimwe cyose, nuko ibyiyumvo binini. Urukundo.
Ibyishimo no gutuza umunezero nuko wegereye kandi utavuga, kandi bimaze gusobanuka ibyo yavuze. Kandi ibintu byose birakorwa, nta migani. Umukunzi wawe ahinduka indorerwamo yawe, ariko ntabwo ari umurongo- nkuko bisanzwe bibaho. Indorerwamo yerekana ibintu byiza bitagaragara byubugingo bwawe kandi bikagufasha kurushaho guhora, bidasanzwe kandi byukuri kuri kamere yawe no gukundana muburyo bwumwuka. Kandi uru rukundo rumwe rushakisha imyaka miremire kandi myinshi, ruhashize kandi rugenda rimwe na rimwe inyuma yabakunda kandi bari hafi. Muguhindura ishyaka, kumukino wurukundo, kumukino mubucuti, umukino muri "modable" na abandira. Birashoboka gukinwa, ariko kubaho, kubaho, kandi nturwaye, ugomba kwiga ibyabaye, rimwe nagatangwa gusa, kandi kubwimpamvu zitandukanye. N'ubundi kandi, urukundo rubabaye byose, rushingiye byose, ibintu byose byihanganira kandi ntibizigera bihwema. Afite inshingano kandi arapfa. Kandi birashoboka niba ugeze mubucuti nyabwo, guhuza ibitsina byumvikana, kwihanganira, umurimo, kubaha no kwigirira icyizere muguhindura buri gihe, urashobora kuza kubyo urukundo nyarwo rwitwa.
Birashoboka ko ushobora kunyura mubyiciro byose udafite ibihombo byiza nubunararibonye, ugomba kumenya no kwiyumvamo. Ushobore kumva urukundo muriwe no kubaha wenyine. Gushobora gukunda abantu gusa. Shakisha umwanya we muri wewe, kandi ntabwo uri mu karonga wa kera: "Urushinge mu magi, igi muri duck, duck muri hare" ... gukunda muri buri wese muri twe. Twahawe nkinyungu nini nikizamini gikomeye. Nk'inzira igana wenyine.
Nyuma ya byose, niba hamwe no kwitanga kwamakuru, ntabwo ari ibyiyumvo bivuye ku mutima, bafata, kandi nta kintu na kimwe kizatanga. Niba uturutse ku mwanya isi yose yampindukiyeho, kandi nkora ibyo nshaka, kandi sinzafata ikintu na kimwe no kwihanganira, noneho gukunda ntibishobora kuboneka. "Nyuma ya byose, ikirahure kandi cyuzuye - umwitero wa egocentric kuri wewe" kandi urukundo ni uguhana. Ariko ni iki ugomba guhinduka?
Kandi kumpera, urashobora gutsinda inama zifuzwa:
Nibishobora gukundana. Ntutinye umubano wa hafi. Gushobora kuba muri bo.
· Kubasha kureka ibiryo byawe Urukundo rwurukundo ruhoraho
· Gushobora gushyikirana no kwihanganira. Emera kukubera amakosa. N'ibibi by'undi muntu.
· Saba guhitamo abantu benshi. Kandi kubwibi - menya kandi unyumve. Gusobanukirwa no kumva intege nke zabo. Buri gihe, buri munsi kora wenyine.
· Gushobora kumva ko wubaha, kwizerana no kumva usuhuha no guhumurizwa mu bwigunge wenyine. Gushobora gusangira no kunguranagura mubucuti. Kuberako niba wuzuza undi muntu, ntabwo ari ukunda, ahubwo wishingikirize ku muntu cyangwa ikindi kintu.
· Wige gukunda. Buri munsi, guhera kubibazo byawe ... Nkunda, kandi nabyumva nte?
N'ubundi kandi, urukundo ni ibyiyumvo twese tutangwa, ariko ntabwo ari impano yose yabyo. Nibihembo byimbaraga, icyifuzo cyo gutsinda ingorane nubushobozi bwo gukora akazi kenshi kuri wewe no mubucuti hamwe, hamwe numufasha wawe.