Iyi nteruro, biragaragara kandi cyane, wumve uburwayi ku bagore. Benshi mu bakobwa ku ishuri, kaminuza na bagenzi babo ku kazi bakorera muri iyi myaka bamaze gufatwa n'umuryango, abana. Amafoto yubukwe, umugore ukiri muto ukiri muto, intambwe yambere yabana ntabwo bigaruriye imiyoboro rusange gusa umunebwe cyangwa umugore wirukanwe cyane.
Reka inzira nshya-imeze kuri 30 byose itangirira, bavuga ko iki gihe ari ukubaka umwuga, kwishora muri bo, kwinezeza no kubaho ku giceri cyuzuye, ibintu byose biri ku bugingo. Abagore bavutse mu myaka ya za 1980 baraterwa n'umuco utandukanye. Kuva mu bwana, nta bitangaza bifatika, hari imikino mu mukobwa wa nyina, ndetse n'ibitekerezo byinshi ku ngingo "Santa Barbara". Abakobwa bo muri ibyo bihe neza niba bagomba gushima indangagaciro z'umuryango hejuru y'abandi.
Tumaze kugera ku isabukuru yimyaka 30, impuruza y'abagore nk'abo igera ku burebure. Psychologiya yise ubunararibonye bwa "Impingamibereho." Ni ukuvuga, umugore aracyafite imitekerereze ntishobora kwitegura gukora umubano, umuryango no kubyara abana, ahubwo ni urwego rwa societe twibanze kubisanzwe, bamubwira ko mu buryo budasanzwe hari ikintu kidasanzwe.
Ubwoba bwo kuba ubwoko runaka bwa "inenge" bwo gukemura iki kibazo uko byagenda kose. Akenshi akora nka serivisi mbi. Hamwe no gutabaza kwiyongera, umugore aje mubucuti kubera ko ari ngombwa "gushyira amatiku" ko ameze neza. Buri kigeragezo cyatsinzwe kiba fiasco kibabaje, bityo ukwemera biragenda gukura ngo "ikintu kibi kuri njye", kandi byose ni bishya. Uruziga rero rufunga.
Aho gukura rwose kandi witegure ubuzima bwumuryango, abagore bayoborwa kwerekana ko ari ibisanzwe. Icyemezo Ibi mubisanzwe byandikirwa ba nyina cyangwa ba se, rimwe na rimwe - abahoze bakorana, imiryango yananiwe. Ariko, ibyo bigerageza ntabwo bitwara amahoro no kwitegura ubuzima bwumuryango. Muri ibi bagerageje, umugore ahinduka cyane, wibande, wihebye. Nta mubano mwiza hano.
Akenshi kubura inyuma yinyuma akomeye muburyo bwubufatanye bwumuryango bufite ishingiro ryumwuga watsinze hamwe nubushobozi bwimari. Erega burya, ntibishoboka kumva uwatsinzwe ahantu hose. Kubwibyo, urashobora guhura numukobwa ukiri muto ufite umwuga utangaje, ufite ubushake kandi wifuza, ariko ufite ubushobozi bwuzuye bwo kubaka umubano wawe.
Nigute wamenya "imyugarabiri mbonezamubano" kuriyi ngingo? Nibyo, byoroshye cyane:
- Niba ukuramo ibitekerezo ko usanzwe ufite imyaka myinshi, kandi nta miryango ninama;
- Niba urimo ugana umwuga watsinze mubirori nabarangije kandi uhura kandi ugasenga ubuzima bwawe bwite kubazwa;
- Niba wiga rwihishwa imbuga zifumbire;
- Niba uri mubyihebye, gutega amatwi inshuti zawe muganire ku bagabo bawe cyangwa abana bawe, noneho byarakubayeho (byanze ko umaze kugera kumyaka ... kuri 25, reka tuvuge);
- Niba ushutswe neza no guhangayika no kwiheba ko igikomangoma cyawe kitagisabwa kandi nta nubwo kiza, urashobora no gushyira mu buryo bwo kwisuzumisha neza.
Ariko ingingo ntabwo ari ukutitondera ibiganiro no gusebanya ibidukikije. Nubwo wiyigisha kwirengagiza urwenya kubashakanye, noneho mubagore bibanze ku ndangagaciro z'umuryango, kurakara no guhangayika no guhangayika ntibizajyaho hose. Muyandi magambo, ndashaka kurema umuryango, ariko muri iyi ngingo hari ingorane nyinshi, ububabare no kwiheba, biroroshye kubitaho no kutazongera gukora ku gikomere.
Umubare munini w'abagore bajuririye kuri iyi ngingo kuri psrapiste n'abavuzi bahura na psrapiste, bavumbuye biturutse ku murimo insanganyamatsiko y'umuryango n'Umubano "yandujwe". Yarundanyije ububabare bwinshi, ubwoba, uburakari. Nk'ubuko amategeko, bikozwe mumiryango yibanze abo bagore bayobye. Kureba ababyeyi bawe, bageze ku mwanzuro w'uko byari byiza kuruta ibyo. Cyangwa ko itazagenda, kandi ntamuntu uzampindura urukundo rwumuryango wanjye.
Intambwe ku yindi, igaragaza imigozi yashize kandi ihari, yunguka umwanya wawe bwite, abagore benshi baracyunama hamwe nabafatanyabikorwa babereye kandi babyara abana. Ahanini kubera ko bakomeje kwizirikana kugirango bemere ko bakeneye inkunga yo gukemura iki kibazo cyihutirwa.
Hagati aho ...
Mu mahanga, ntabwo gamenyerewe kubara imyaka y'abagore kugeza ku myaka 30. Hariho twizeye ko nyuma yigihe cya 30 gusa mugihe umugabo numugore bagomba gutekereza ko barema umuryango, hamwe nigitekerezo cya "urubyiruko" cyuzuye mumyaka 40. Kandi ibimenyetso byibi ni byinshi mu nyenyeri za Hollywood. Urugero, umukinnyi uzwi cyane Penelope Cruz yashakanye n'umukinnyi w'imyaka 36 w'icyesipanyoli, ariko ntaratekereza ku bashakanye, Leonardo di Caprio mu myaka 39 na we ntabwo yigeze arongora. Shakira Shakira - Ntiyigeze arongora, ariko ubu atigeze arongora, ariko ubu umukinnyi wa filime isa nkaho igerageza ku ruhare rw'umugeni: nk'uko bigaragara ko itangazamakuru rivuga ko itangazamakuru rivuga ko inyenyeri imaze kwitegura ubukwe hamwe na Sean Penn. Umuhanzi wo muri Kolombiya Shakira yabonaga umunezero we mu myaka 33 gusa - neza muri iki gihe umukinnyi wa filime yatangiye guhura n'umukinnyi w'umupira w'amaguru Gerard, maze abyara umuhungu we. Nibyo, abashakanye ntibaramanuka umubano - Shakira yemera ko kashe yo muri pasiporo ntacyo itwaye.
Maria Zebeskova, umuganga wa psychologue, Umuvuzi wumuryango, Amahugurwa Yambere Yimiryango Yiterambere Yumuntu Marka Khazina