Iherezo rimwe na rimwe bakuramo imiterere idasanzwe, basunika abantu kuri mugenzi wabo nigihe cyabo. Urashobora kuvuga indimi zitandukanye, uba mu bihugu bitandukanye, gukunda ibiryo bitandukanye, byishimira iminsi mikuru itandukanye. Kandi ibi byose bizaba ngombwa rwose uramutse uhuriye numuntu wawe, uwo muntu ukunda kubana imyaka amagana.
Niba kandi uhuye, umenye kandi ukundane nikinyejana cyacu, tekinoroji ya interineti yoroshye, nubwo uburyo bwo kubaka umubano numunyamahanga, kumurongora no kuzana umunezero wawe mumyaka myinshi kubana?
Mu burengerazuba, nko mu Burusiya, hari abagabo batandukanye rwose. Kugirango wubake umubano uhuza, ugomba kumenya no gufata imigenzo nibiranga imitekerereze yuwatoranijwe. Ibi bizaguha gusobanukirwa ibitekerezo bye, ibitekerezo bye kumibereho, urufatiro rwumuryango nibiteganijwe kumugore wabo. Muri icyo gihe, umubano mwiza hamwe numunyamahanga nukuri, niba dusuzumye ibintu bimwe na bimwe.
Julia Lansk
Ifoto: Instagram.com/Umurongo wa
Ibiranga umubano mpuzamahanga
Ikiranga nimero 1: Abanyamahanga begera aho ibyaremwe no kubaka urusengero rwumuryango wabo. Nk'itegeko, biteguye gushyingirwa mu myaka 33-40, mugihe inzira yo guhindura imico yabo izabera, kandi mbere yicyo gihe barimo gukura kwabo, imyuga yabo no kuba.
Mu Burusiya, aha, abagabo n'abagore barashobora guhangayita mu miryango, babyarana abana ndetse bakanacika umubano.
Ikiranga nimero 2: Iyo umugabo wumunyamahanga afashe umugore uvuga umugore we wu Burusiya, afata inshingano zose kuri we, kuko yunvise neza ko we, yimukira mu kindi gihugu, ahindura ibintu byose hano kandi agahindura ibintu bikabije. Amenya ko utazoroha kubona akazi mu gihugu cye: Emeza inyandiko zawe mu burezi, wige ururimi ushake akazi.
Kandi umenye neza: Niba umunyamahanga yiteguye gushyira izo nshingano, noneho uri mubyukuri, umugore ukundwa cyane kandi wifuza. Reka iyi mico izakuraho ubwoba bwinyongera muri wewe kandi izagufasha kwitegura guhuza nukuri, igihugu, abantu n'umuco.
Ikiranga nimero 3: Birakenewe kubaka umubano numunyamahanga wimbitse, kuko hariho imyumvire imwe mu bagore bavuga Ikirusiya, ko abagore bose bo mu mwanya wa nyuma) bashaka kurongora. Naho igihugu cye.
Ni "urukuta rutwikiriye" ugomba kongera kubakwa, gushira ku matafari. Komeza uwatoranijwe, kumugaragaro kandi wiyubashye, kandi cyane cyane, ube umurava. Numurava, gufungura no kwiheba cyane ni ugushaka abanyamahanga abagabo mumugore wabo.
Ikiranga nimero 4: Erega umugabo wumunyamahanga ningirakamaro cyane mubuzima bwatoranijwe ningeso ze. Ni ngombwa cyane ko bihuye nawe, kurugero, urashobora kuvuga ko wibandaho ku kwiyitaho byihutirwa.
N'ubundi kandi, mu bihugu by'Uburayi udashobora kubona umugabo cyangwa umugore utazitondera ubuzima bwabo. Abanyaburayi benshi ni siporo yose, mu ngero zabo, ahanini, agaciro k'ubuzima bukora kandi bukora birasanzwe.
Ubumwe bwawe buzahoraho mugihe utekereje kubijyanye nuburyo ushobora guhuza, ndetse nibyiza - "bibaho" muri icyo gihugu aho biteguye kugenda
Ifoto: Ibisobanuro.com.
Ikiranga nimero 5: Ugomba kumenya ibyo witeze mubuzima bwawe. Kora ibi byibuze shingiro, kubera ko umunyamahanga azashaka kukwumva neza uburyo ubona ubuzima bwawe mubukwe nubutunzi bafite ubushake bwo gushora imari mumibanire yacu. Muri icyo gihe, umunyamahanga akunze kwerekana ko umwitayeho ku giti cye, umwanya wawe n'amarangamutima, witeguye gushora imari mu kuvugana nawe.
Umugabo w'iburengerazuba azashaka kumva hakiri kare uburyo uzubaka umubano nkumwitegura kwimuka kuruta gutegura kubikora, kwimuka, nibyo utekereza kwisanga.
Ihuriro ryawe rizahoraho niba utekereza kubyutsa uburyo ushobora guhuza, ndetse nibyiza "mugihugu witeguye kugenda, kuko gusabana no kwishyira hamwe muri societe nshya bizaba ngombwa kuri wowe. Nk'Ubutegetsi, abagabo b'Abanyaburayi bashyigikira icyifuzo cyo guhitamo kwishyiriraho, harimo binyuze mu kazi.
Niki gishobora kugabanya amahirwe yo gushyingirwa hamwe numunyamahanga?
"Achilles ya gatanu" irashobora kuba adashobora kuvuga mu bwisanzure mu rurimi rw'uwo yahisemo n'utuba atarabitangaza.
Nibyo, mubyiciro byambere byo gukundana, urafasha cyane kumusemuzi iyo ari yo yose yo kumurongo. Ariko, iterambere ryimibanire rizaba nkenerwa kuburyo bwo kuvuga, bitabaye ibyo, umubano wawe nuwatoranijwe uzagenda.
Ni ngombwa kuri wewe kureba isi "udafite ibirahuri byijimye" kandi bitayoborwa n'ihame ryo "byiza aho tutariho." Ntugomba kuva mu mahanga, gusa kubera ko udashobora kwitegereza murugo kandi wizeye ko uzisanga mu burengerazuba. Birashoboka kubisubizo nkibi ni bike. Biragoye rwose guhinduka "ibyawe" mubihugu by'undi, kandi muri wewe, hamwe no gushyigikira umukunzi wawe, birashobora kugufasha kugira uburambe, ubumenyi no kwifuza gukura guhoraho.
By the way, kuruhuka mu mahanga kandi ube mu mahanga ntabwo ari kure y'ikintu kimwe. Kubwibyo, ntabwo ari ngombwa gufata icyemezo cyo kwimukira ahantu hahoraho ho gutura mu kindi gihugu, bishingiye gusa kumarangamutima gusa byakiriwe mugihe cyibiruhuko. Ntaho bahuriye nigitekerezo cyubuzima bwa buri munsi muri iki gihugu ni ibintu bitandukanye rwose.
Ikintu cyingenzi mugikorwa cyo gushyikirana nuwuhuriweho ni ugushyira ingingo zose hejuru ya "I", gusobanukirwa no gufata ukuri gushya imbere yubukwe bwawe kandi bimukira mu kindi gihugu
Ifoto: Ibisobanuro.com.
Ibyifuzo 3 byambere kubwinyungu zumubano wawe hamwe numunyamahanga:
Shyira ahagaragara umwanya wo kwiga ururimi umugabo wawe avuga. Ugomba gushobora gushiraho neza ibitekerezo byawe no kumva ibyo bavuze nta kugoreka.
Itondere ubumenyi bwa psychologiya yumugabo. Ibi bizagufasha kubona ubwumvikane numugabo wakuriye mubindi migenzo muyindi societe. Nkigisubizo, uzongera kubaka itumanaho nuburyo wahisemo kandi ugakomeza ibiganiro kubisobanuro bishimishije kuri we.
Gerageza kumenya byinshi ku birebana nravas, imigenzo n'imigenzo y'abantu umunyamahanga ngo mu ngingo gukwirwa mu muryango we, ngo imibereho ye, kwifatanya sosiyete no kuba, ngo basa, umugore wiwe mukundwa na ibyishimo.
Reka tuzane incamake nto
Niba ushaka kurongora umunyamahanga ukundwa kandi wuje urukundo ukagenda kuba mumahanga, ni ngombwa cyane ko ibyo witezeho kubahiriza unyuzwe niteka ryumuntu wawe, byibuze ukurikije ibyo bipimo byingenzi:
- Indangagaciro zubuzima n'ibiteganijwe mu gice cya kabiri cya kabiri mu bashakanye;
- Kwishyira hamwe kwawe muri societe n'amahirwe yo kwishyira hamwe;
- Reba ku rubanda nyamukuru rwo kubana, kurugero, kuvuka no kurera abana.
Ikintu cyingenzi mugikorwa cyo kuvugana nuwatoranijwe ni ugushyira ingingo zose hejuru ya "I", kugirango dusobanukirwe kandi dufate ukuri gushya imbere yubukwe bwawe no kujya mu kindi gihugu. Hanyuma ibihugu bitandukanye hamwe ninzitizi zururimi ntizibuza umubano wawe wishimye, kuko ibyavuzwe haruguru birashobora gukuraho ibyakubayeho kandi koroshya inzira yo kwinjira muri societe nshya.