Undi majwi y'intare yabonye ko "imiryango yose yishimye isa, umuryango wose utishimye utishimye muburyo bwabo." Kandi rimwe na rimwe biragaragara ko mu miryango itera imbere, imiryango ifite "skeleti mu kabati", bitinde bitebuke cyangwa nyuma bikaba rusange. Ni ayahe mashya mabi agerageza kwihisha rubanda? Kandi icyo gukora mugihe ibanga rimaze kugaragara?
Gusambana cyangwa pedophilia. Byizewe kugirango umenye aho ahantu nk'aha mu rwego rw'umuryango wawe, ntibishimishije cyane. Akenshi kubibera mubyukuri munsi yinzu, abagore bazamenya igihe kirekire. Kandi ubaze ikibazo, kuko uko byashobokaga kutabona uko byagendekeye umwana we. Ariko ntabwo buri gihe bivuye ku mutima: umuntu rwose ntazi ibintu nyabyo ibintu byabayeho mu rugo rwe, kandi umuntu, nka ostrich, ahisha ubuhanga umutwe mu mucanga. Ni iki abo bagore bayoboye, bakemerera pedophile babana na we munsi y'inzu, yishora mubana be ntiburamenyekana. Ikintu kimwe kirasobanutse: Umwana nkigisubizo kinini cyibi byose yakira imitekerereze minini, aho ashobora kutazigera akuraho nta mfashanyo ya psychologue. Kandi ntibishoboka ko umuntu, usibye imitekerereze, izavuga kubyo yakorewe urugomo.
Inyandiko. Mu gihugu cyacu, imyanda kuva mu kazu ntiyemewe. Kubwibyo, niba umugore akorerwa ihohoterwa rishingiye ku gitsina n'umugabo we cyangwa kubana neza, bigaragarira ku magambo gusa, ahubwo bigaragazwa no gukubitwa, ubusanzwe acecekesha. Akenshi, ndetse naba bagore ntibabwira ababyeyi babo ndetse nabakobwa bakobwa ba hafi kubyerekeye induru baseka burimunsi. Barataka kandi batagira kirengera imbere yibitero. Kandi ni, nk'uburyo, mu mibanire ihunze n'imiryango ifatanije, ndetse n'ubujurire bw'inzego zishinzwe kubahiriza amategeko ntabwo ibaha: kuko iki cyiciro cy'abagore, gutanga ibyifuzo byabo, nyuma yuko umunsi we asanzwe afata. Mubafashe kuva muribi bihe birashobora gusangira umurimo wumunyamategeko na psychologue.
Olga Romaman
Ibaruramari muri psychuatrist. Ibyerekeye bene wabo bateje ikibazo gikomeye cyumuganga wumuganga kandi basuzumwa cyane, ntibashobora no kuvuga mumuryango. Abantu biga kubintu nkibi kubwamahirwe, nubwo ntaho bikagira isoni muribi. Ubwonko nurwego rumwe rwumubiri wumuntu, kimwe nabandi, bityo birashobora kunanirwa. Umuntu arashobora gukenera ubufasha bwujuje ibyangombwa byumuganga, kuko nta tera abakobwa bakobwa kandi ingingo ziva kuri interineti zizasubizwa aho hantu.
Ukwemera. Kugira ngo umenye ko umuntu wo muri bene wanyu yazanywe mu buryo buhuriye n'ibyaha, na we kubwamahirwe. Igihe kimwe - kandi gitunguranye bigaragara ko nyirakuru wawe bombi baburanishijwe. Kubyerekeye umwe wari ubizi. Yagiye muri gereza mu gihe cy'intambara: yari umwangavu kandi akora ku ruganda rwingabo. Indero yari ifite igihe gikomeye, igihe cya gisirikare, kandi yari aryamyeho igihe cyose, kuko yari akiri umwana! Iyo bimaze gutinya gutinda noherezwa hakurikijwe amategeko yintambara kugirango akore manda. Bari bicaye mu cyumba ari kumwe na gereza, bamutuma amwemera ko ari we mu nzira, avuga ko yamukijije umunsi umwe. Hari ukuntu, mu mpera za 60s, nyuma yaje gusubira mu rugo avuye ku kazi, maze umusirikare akururira mu muryango. Nateye ubwoba icyuma, nashakaga kwiyambura kandi, wenda, kwica. Nabonye Acklain ye kandi ntacyo nkora, yahisemo ko ari "iye." Nyirakuru wa kabiri yitandukanije nigihe cya nyuma yintambara, yagize uruhare mubitekerezo bimwe na bimwe byakirwa muriki gihe. Noneho twakwita ubwo buriganya nubucuruzi buciriritse - uzatekereza kubigurishwa. Ariko hashize imyaka 2-3 gusa intambara irangiye, nta kintu na kimwe mu gihugu, kandi hano "ubucuruzi." Ikindi gihe. Ijambo ryayo ryari ibanga, ritwikiriwe n'umwijima ndetse n'umukobwa we, aho yahise yakira igihano. Gusa bashiki be bazwiho kuri iyi nkuru, ibitswe kugeza ibya nyuma kandi batavuze imyaka myinshi, ndetse na nyuma y'urupfu rwa nyirakuru. Birashoboka, ntabwo ari amayobera ateye ubwoba, ariko baramugumanye neza mubitekerezo byabo no mumitima yabo.
Kurera. Noneho ababyeyi benshi bategereje ko umwana amaze kwemeza ko umwana adahisha ko adakomoka. Bafite uburenganzira bwuzuye. Ariko, amategeko yacu aracyarinda ibanga ryo kurerwa, ni ko ntawundi, usibye ababyeyi, ntashobora kumenyesha umwana ibintu nk'ibi. Muri ibyo, birumvikana ko hari ibisobanuro runaka: ntabwo abana bose bashobora kumva neza amakuru nyina yambuwe uburenganzira bwababyeyi cyangwa ku bushake ku bushake mu bitaro. Ndetse no kuba umuntu mukuru, umuntu rimwe na rimwe ntashobora gutuza: gushaka ababyeyi be kandi, hari ibibazo, mbona. Gusa ntabwo buri gihe ari umugore wataye umwana we akivuka arashaka kuvugana nawe akuze. Kandi ubu ni ubundi buryo bwo gutenguha ugomba kubona abantu nkabo. Ahari byaba byiza utabizi kubyerekeye kurerwa.