Umwanditsi mwiza Marika - Umushingamategeko wicyerekezo gishya muri siyanse nicyo giofank ya socio-psychologiya. Merika yashakaga igitabo kidasanzwe, umubumbe wa none "kuvuka k'umucamanza", "urupfu rw'Umuyobozi" - kamaze gutangazwa. Iki gitabo ntabwo gishimishije mubijyanye nubuvanganzo, ariko nanone ufite akamaro mubijyanye na psychologiya. Ni uruhe rutera muri iki gihe gake cyane.
Ntibisanzwe cyane ko ibihimbano, ibyo kurya, bitwaje agaciro kubasomyi. Ni iki mubyukuri ushobora kubyigiraho?
Mubyukuri nereka ibintu byose bya "ubusumbane" bwabagabo nabagore. Muri rusange, Ji yibye isugi, kubera ko umugore ari mwiza mu mpande zose, ntabwo aririnda gusa, ahubwo aririnda ibye, kuko ubwabyo byakandamijwe ntaho bibaho. Umuntu wese abaho kubwinyungu, ariko gukoresha undi muntu birashobora kuba muburyo butandukanye.
1. Uburinganire bw'indangagaciro. Ndagukorera, kuko twaba ari ngombwa kuri wewe kubwisanzure kandi nkunda ibyo ngukorera. Kuberako amaherezo, ndacyabikora kubwibyishimo byanjye.
2. lichivo-ikigwari. Iyo umuntu adagize icyizere agaciro ke kubwawe wenyine. Noneho ruswa, blackmail, gukoresha ibintu byose birashobora, harimo nubwoko butandukanye bwa poropagande hamwe nigitutu cyumubiri.
Kuki abagore bakunze gutangira kubaho mubuzima bwumuntu wabo?
Iki gitabo kivugaho iki
Umwami w'abami despotike Ji yibye umukobwa witwa Hakiss mu bwana, maze agira uruhara urukundo rwinshi kuri we, agamije umushyitsi - yakoze intwaro nziza. Khakiss, ni Bass, afite ubushobozi bwa telepathic idasanzwe kandi arashobora kurohama mubiremwa byose bizima kurwego rwa selire. Ubuzima bwigitumbu ni bwo kutubuza gukorera Umwami, kuba ikintu cye ashobora gutanga cyangwa ngo akoreshe uwo ari we wese cyangwa gukoresha nk'umuyobozi, buri gihe ahahanaguye kwibuka. Kubintu byose bitumvira cyangwa kwigaragaza kumiterere, Tiran yahannye bunyamaswa umukobwa, kandi impamyabumenyi yahoraga ahabwa amarangamutima. Ariko umunsi umwe, umwana yamenye ko ari mubigeragezo bisanzwe, umusuzumiro akeneye kugera kuntego ze.
Ariko hamwe nibi biragoye cyane. Kubera ko ari ngombwa kubanza gusobanukirwa, kuringaniza mubuzima bwawe, hagati yimiterere nyayo nibihimbano. Kandi hano buri kimwe gishobora. Bamwe barimo kwinjizwa mu "rimwe na rimwe" kwabo kwakwirakwizaga bashinzwe ku bana babyaranye, bibagirwa ubwabo. Ni ukuvuga, igikona ni urugero h hypertrophic yumugore. Asigaye rwose mu mugabo we. Kandi mugihe cyubutubu, arimo yishakira.
Igihe cyose umugore atumva agaciro ke kuri we, azayoborwa nabandi. Hano ndi mu gihome, dore ntabwo biri mubibazo ikibazo, ariko mu gihome. Ni ukuvuga, mu ihame ryemeza, "we ubwe yemereye" - hariho igipimo cyacyo.
Nuburyo bwo gusobanukirwa ako gaciro k'umuntu ku giti cye, niba hari igitutu n'igitekerezo gihoraho ku muntu ukunda?
Niyo mpamvu nanditse igitabo gifasha guhumura ukuri ku kuri, nubwo cyaba kimeze gute. Kandi ukemure ninde ukunzwe rwose n'impamvu. Umuntu ubwe agomba kubatekerezaho agaciro ke. Kuberako abaho ubuzima bwe kandi ko azabikora - ibi nicyubahiro cye.
Ni ukuvuga, kuki ntangiye? Ibintu byose ni byiza kandi byiza: Suba amakimbirane asanzwe ari Umwami ubwe, isanzure ryose hamwe nitsinda ryabacuruza riba mu rukundo rukomeye n'ibinezeza kandi gitunguranye - Batz! - Ntabwo ibintu byose atari byiza cyane kandi kure, bibi. Kubera iki ?! Kuva kuruhande: ibintu byose biratangaje. Umugabo, akazi, gahunda yuzuye. Kandi utangira kureba imbere - byose ni bibi rwose. Kubera iki no kubihe? Nuburyo bwo gushiraho byose, kugirango byari byiza kandi imbere? Hano hari igitonyanga kuri uku gusobanukirwa bucece. Ariko ubanza agomba kubona ko ari bibi.
Vuba aha, habaye udusimba twatanze ubuvuzi bwa TV, yavuze ko abahohotewe ubwabo bagomba kubaryozwa ko ntacyo bakoze batabatsinze. Utekereza ko arukuri aya magambo?
Icyemezo icyo ari cyo cyose cyo ku gahato / kubuzwa - ntigikwiye, ariko hano birakenewe kugira sisitemu yinjira, nkuko abantu bakeneye kurindwa imigenzo. Ninde udafite imbibi z'imiterere yabandi. Ni ukuvuga, abagizi ba nabi bose bagomba kwamburwa amahirwe yo kuzana ibyangiritse kumubiri cyangwa imico kubandi bantu.
Mfata ikibazo cyagutse cyane mumwicanyi kuruta intambara nukuri. Abusser nikibazo cyihariye, amahitamo yumubano wibintu bidashidikanywaho, utaramenye imiterere nubundi bubi.
Byemezwa ko igitambo ubwacyo kishaka intebe kubafatanyabikorwa, mubyukuri nibyo?
Mu rwego rwo kumenya neza - kumva ko dusobanukiwe kwa psychologiya - niba uwahohotewe ashaka, yaba yagiye. Benshi mu bahohotewe bahohotewe bahitamo bahitamo depotique abafatanyabikorwa. Ariko hano ugomba gusuzuma ibintu bibiri:
1. Duhereye ku buryo bwo gukurikirana amahame yo gukurikirana imyitwarire - kugirango duhuze undi muntu nabi.
Niba uri umutsima - shakisha massochiste, kandi ntukore Masochist mubintu byambere.
2. kuyobora abandi na gato ntabwo ari byiza.
Nuburyo bwo kugera ku mibanire myiza muri rusange?
Mu isi itandukanye cyane, dukeneye kwiga kubaho mu mico itandukanye n'indangagaciro. Intambara ntabwo izana umuntu uwo ari we wese, ndetse n'abatsinze bashyingura igihombo cyabo, kandi nintwaro zigezweho ntihazabaho abatsinze, bityo ni ngombwa cyane kwiga kubaho mu mico itandukanye y'abantu n'abatwara imico itandukanye. Ni ukuvuga, ikintu nyamukuru nubwisanzure bwawe bwo gufata undi muntu uko biri, mugihe atazamuka mu bugingo bwawe.
Ni ukuvuga, Trite - umudendezo wawe urarangiza aho ubwisanzure bwundi muntu butangiye kandi iyi mpirimbanyi cyane ni ngombwa kugirango abantu babeho kubaho.
Hano hari ikintu cyingenzi gushira no kubahiriza iyi mipaka. Ni ngombwa rwose kuri wewe ibyo umukobwa wawe agenda - mu mwenda cyangwa ipantaro? Umubaji yari ku mugore w'undi wese agomba kuguhangayikisha aramutse ahaze uyu mugore n'umugabo we? Ariko birakwiye kugeza igihe uzagutera kwambara icyifuzo cyawe. Ni ukuvuga, birakenewe neza ko twumva neza aho imipaka yumuntu ku giti cye, kandi uzishima.
