Iyo ubukwe bwasenyutse, abana babuze imbaraga. Ntabwo batakaje umuryango gusa, ahubwo banabona umutekano, kandi mugihe nta mutekano umva, bisa nkaho isi yose irasenyuka. Kandi nta ruziga n'ibikinisho bizashobora kuzuza iki gihombo. Surova Ibarurishamibare: Abana bakomoka mu miryango ituzuye birashoboka more kwiga nabi, bafite ibyago makuru yo gutwita w'umuyabaga, inzoga n'ibiyobyabwenge, ibibazo vy'akanyengetera no mu myifatire akenshi nta kurangira ndetse mu more mature age.
Muri iki gihe, gusenga kw'abana byahindutse hamwe n'imbaraga zidasanzwe. Umwana yashyize mumutwe winguni hanyuma shiraho nyamukuru mumuryango nubusabane. Ariko ni ngombwa ko inyungu n'ukeneye umwana bifite akamaro kuruta inyungu n ibyifuzo by'uwo mwashakanye, ikosa rikomeye! Ibyiza ababyeyi bashobora gukorera abana babo, kwiga kubana neza. Ushaka kuba umubyeyi mwiza - ube umukunzi mwiza kubo mwashakanye. Nibyo, ntabwo buri gihe bishoboka.
Mw'isi nyayo, ababyeyi bakubise kenshi. Ndetse irahangayitse cyane kuba abashakanye bahoze badashoboye gukomeza urugwi dusanzwe cyangwa, byibuze, umubano w'ababyeyi hagati yabo. Umubare munini wabana cyangwa usigaye rwose udafite umwe mubabyeyi cyangwa bahatiwe gufata papa cyangwa mama bashya gusa kuberako abantu bakunze gufunga umubyeyi washize mubuzima. Ariko umwana mubihe nkibi ni iki?
Ingorane zose zikomeye hamwe nabana kuva mubukwe bushya (n'ababyeyi baturutse mu bashakanye bashize) bavuka bitewe nuko abantu bakuru badashobora gushyikirana no gutegura imvugo iboneye mu mibanire y'abantu bose babishaka: abana, abahoze ari abashakanye.
Mu gihugu cyacu, imyitozo ni ko abana nyuma yo gutandukana kenshi bagumana na nyina. Ibi bivuze ko umugabo ugiye kubaka ubuzima bwe numugore ufite umwana bahatirwa kubana numwana mubutaka bumwe no kubaka kuvugana nawe. Byasa nkaho abagore bashyingirwa umugabo ufite umwana muriki kibazo biroroshye, ariko mubikorwa kandi bafite ingorane nyinshi zijyanye, nkubutegetsi, umugore wa mbere.
Abana bakuru bagomba gushobora gukomeza umubano uhamye nababyeyi bombi.
Ifoto: Ibisobanuro.com.
Nubwo abashakanye bashakanye nyuma yo gutandukana, abana basanzwe bagomba gukomeza umubano uhamye nababyeyi bombi (niba ababyeyi batambuwe cyangwa ntibayobora ubuzima budahwitse). Tutitaye ku mwana we wagumye nyuma yo gutandukana, abahoze ari abafatanyabikorwa bagomba kumvikanaho bagashyiraho amategeko rusange y'uburezi. Ntabwo hagomba kubaho ibihe umwana ufite umunsi wa mama umunsi wose asoma ibitabo akanakina piyano, hamwe na papa - umunsi umwe wicaye kuri mudasobwa cyangwa konsole.
Amarushanwa kubwiburyo bwo kwitwa umubyeyi mwiza, nkitegeko, arekurwa na psyche yumwana. "Kwirengagiza" Papa byuzuye muri sosiyete, umwana ntashaka gusubira ku isi iboneza kandi agenga amategeko mama amushiraho. Rero, ntabwo ari ubutware bwababyeyi gusa bwa nyina, ahubwo no mu mugabo wacyo mushya, burakajwe n'amakimbirane mu muryango.
Uburezi bwiza bwabana busaba itumanaho ryiza. Nubwo abahoze ari abahoze ari abashakanye hamwe nabafatanyabikorwa babo bashya ntibakundana cyangwa batavuga rumwe kubibazo byinshi, bagomba kuba itsinda rimwe mugihe cyo kurera abana. Ni ngombwa kubyemera: Abafatanyabikorwa bashya b'abahoze bakorana - abitabiriye amahugurwa yuzuye mu burezi. Ikosa rikomeye rizabatandukanya inzira yo kurengera cyangwa guhungabanya ububasha bwabo, kimwe no gusaba abana kurera no kumvira.
Abafatanyabikorwa bashya b'ababyeyi ku bijyanye no gushyingirwa kera ni ngombwa gukomeza hagati ya zahabu: Kudahakana umwana, ariko nanone ntugerageze kumutererana kuruhande rwawe. IMIKORANIRE muri uru rubanza bigomba gushingira ku ndangagaciro zoroshye kandi zumvikana ku mwana: kwitabwaho, kwitabwaho, kwitaho, gufungura, kwizerana. Nubwo byababaye mbere bitari byoroshye, ni ngombwa kubona umwana kumenyera umwana. Uyu ni umugabo mushya wa Mama - Umukunzi numuntu wa hafi, ariko umwana aracyamufata no kumukunda, kandi ibi rimwe na rimwe bisaba igihe kinini. Ariko ko iri hame ryashobokaga, uwo bashakanye mushya cyangwa umubyeyi mushya uwo bashakanye agomba kuba umwe mu bagize umuryango mukuru. Kandi ni ngombwa kumva abantu bose: kandi abagiye kuba umugabo wa kabiri cyangwa umugore wa kabiri, n'abagiye kugirana mubukwe bushya nyuma yo gutandukana.