Recently, one young woman shared with me sleep. Busy, I must say. I bring it as an example today:
"My father, with whom in the life of the already tense relationship, I constantly owe him, in my dream I bought a huge crocodile and brought to the house. Then he said that he had a lot of affairs and somehow disappeared from the house, and I stayed alone with a dangerous crocodile. We have a struggle with him, as a result of which to survive, I killed this crocodile. What is it for?"
Sleep is so visual and transparent that it will not be difficult to disassemble it.
Our dreamy probably perceives his father, like a monster, dangerous and threatening, which is necessary to overcome. It can be assumed that their relationship is like a war: quarrels, disassembly, claims, a large distance between them.
At the same time, the dream itself is a hint: the real father left the house in a dream, leaving the crocodile instead of himself. In other words, our heroine is fighting not with a real father, but in the way she remained as a result of accumulated experience. Most likely, she is too angry or offended by his father, because it is always ready for an attack or defense.
In such a situation, there are few chances to reach the real father, there is no opportunity to truly talk to him and express unspoken over the years.
It's not the time in a dream, and in real life anew to meet your father. It is possible to know it better as a person, and not as an authority, from which some requirements are expected.
In other words, how to change perception with "monsters" on the "Pap-person"?
The task is not simple, for a huge number of people lives with the idea that their ideas about loved ones are truth in the last instance. If the beliefs of the type "Mom will never understand" or "dad only demands" to maintain it, then there is no chance of real intimacy and supporting their parents. But for this it is necessary to experiment so that these rules cease to be reinforced with: it's time to invest in communicating with loved ones, risk, try, spending time together, speak frankly, invite to dialogue.
It seems that our dreams have a chance if she reads his dream in this way.
I wonder what you dream?
Maria Zemskova, PSYCHOLOGIST, Family therapist and leading trainings of personal growth Training center Marika Khazina