Romantic people and psychologists calling for seeing around positive, believe that sex in a married couple is a way to express to each other feelings and be closer. What is the form of proximity and maximum contact, not only physical, and also emotional.
However, if you look attentively, you can find that sex is not always a form to be together. It happens that this is a way to go apart. Sleeping our dreams is an excellent example.
"Before bedtime, I went to bed with feeling that I would like sex. But the husband was busy. So fell asleep, and the dream dreamed like this: I and my husband. We have a van with him, a la gazelle minibus. The van stands on the street of the city, very similar to my city of childhood, but I can not identify it for sure. My husband and I have sex in this van. We are together together. I'm above. There is no satisfaction. Just a process.
At some point he appears nearby ... And I already have one having sex. Strange ... a sense of dissatisfaction with the process. "
What a candy is this dream! How clear it illustrates the concept of proximity to a pair. A woman has sex with her husband, being completely separated from what is happening to him. It is fixed on himself and his feeling of dissatisfaction. Suppose it is a dream, but such a dream, which many revealing. Imagine that it is experiencing another partner when he sees that sex with it is a process for the sake of the process and more disappointment than pleasure. Who is he at this moment for himself? As far as he wants such proximity, in which it is more function, and even unfinished? Surely you had to worry about something like at least one day, when, despite sexual proximity, you knew that the partner in my mind was distant from you and only uses contact with you for certain sensations. What is it to feel used or used?
Sexual relationships in a pair - this is a thin Lacmus piece of self-editions in the first place
Photo: pixabay.com/ru.
This does not mean that you should be occupied only by your partner and its satisfaction with the process, not at all. The meaning of paragraph above is not to cause a sense of guilt, but to pay attention, as sometimes the process of maximum "proximity" becomes a real means of maximum distance from the partner.
But even more visuality becomes a dream in his climax when the husband is nearby. The dream demonstrates a dreaming, as far as her husband has a parallel attitude towards how much she is satisfied with itself, life and, as part of this life, relationships with Him.
Sexual relationships in a pair - this is a thin lactium piece of self-editions in the first place. It is customary to blame a partner in unsatisfactory sex life, in fact the ability to experience pleasure, contact, orgasm, surrender and enjoy - this is the ability of a woman to which a partner can affect only indirectly, no matter how skillful lover. The case is just how quality related to the sexual sphere are inherent in people in everyday life. What about the ability to be in contact? What with the ability to rejoice and be with another person? What is the ability to be totally immersed in the process? As far as people are really satisfied with whom they are, and not looking for opportunities to raise their self-esteem at the expense of someone? Sex is a process of confirming the one who people see themselves with their own eyes: losers disappointed with life, disturbing and incredulous, depressed, deceived and used, who know in the shower that there is no place for them in this relationship. Or valuable and concerning care, interested and loving, clear, loyal.
Sex in the long-term pair is an amazing adventure and self-knowledge.
If our dream is an interpretation in the soul, you can deepen in the topic of frustration by yourself, feeling from life, as a "process for the sake of the process", of life without joy and obvious meaning.
Well, you look at your partner and yourself next to him. What will you tell you a sex life and dreams about her?
Examples of your dreams send by mail: [email protected]. The way, the dreams are much easier to express if in a letter to the editor you will write preceding life circumstances, but most importantly - feelings and thoughts at the time of awakening from this dream.
Maria Dyachkova, PSYCHOLOGIST, Family therapist and leading trainings of personal growth Training center Marika Khazin