"Paradox, but against the background of numerous public parsing of sex scandals in schools, online recognition in rapes and other diverse" shades of gray "in fashion seems to be included ... innocence. And not only in girls, but also in boys. And the trend is directed not to extract the momentary benefit (an extra bonus for a successful marriage), but it reminds that the Spirit that was brought up during the days of the former honest beauties - the family cannot be started with deception, and therefore take care of honor.
Right to innocence
The issue prompted the forum on the network, where young people discussed the topic of virginity. No erotica:
"Do you know that in 1942 the German doctor, having conducted a gynecological examination of the girls from the USSR for hard work in Germany, found that 99% of unmarried Soviet women from 15 to 25 years old are virgin? And after that, he in horror reported Hitler that these Russians are so moral! "
The author supports interlocutors: they say, yes, innocence is the indicator that the girl is protecting the honor, and who will choose his own honor, he will take care of the honor and family, and a husband, and countries. True, on this resource, young people do not include this postulate to themselves, believing that the man still should have experience before he takes a virgin to his wife. And it follows from some "second-rate" female individuals who honor do not shovel.
Still in young men, waiting for innocence from their future wives, there are such motivations:
"A girl without sex experience is able to love his first man once and forever and will not compare the size and equipment."
"All sorts of" passing "novels in the end ruffle the girls psyche. And if you want to live with her all my life, it should be psychologically saved. And it is not by chance that the virgins become faithful wives - they fix their libido on the first man. "
Impressive, I am interviewing a teenage psychologist, as well as moms, who, like me, grew up at a time when it was easy to "put out in girls", even if you have not yet found your only one. With innocence in our time, most girls were in a hurry to part in order to become "like everyone else" to become faster and able to support conversations in the service of peers.
"I look at my daughter and her girlfriends," the mother of 19-year-old students Kati shares, "there is a feeling that they hung in childhood - no one meets with guys, and only their studies are interested. I even confess, somehow overheard specially what they say about. It seemed to sat down, like us in youth, with Vintsy, and the conversations are all only about credits and some special courses! Is it normal? Here my sort of there is a boyfriend. But she does not go anywhere in the evenings, sitting at home, it does not get out of the computer. And the daughter of my girlfriend 22 knocked when she began to meet with a guy. He walked for her for her with flowers, sleeved. In this February, they went to Europe, he gave her a trip for the day of lovers. But she put the condition - two separate rooms. Returning, praised that there was nothing among them. Mother to her: "Well, in vain!" And the daughter: "Bliss yourself - this is my right!" I even calmed down a little when I learned that I was not my one - they were all now asked, straight fashion to be painka.
Teenage psychologist Julia Bryanskaya belongs to the same generation, when officially innocence was welcomed, but in the maidial sidelines was discussed, as if to get rid of her as soon as possible:
- We have already conditionally named the phenomenon of "Pai-Girls". Something similar has already been in world history, and in domestic. Such "seizures of morality" usually happen after surplus of sexual freedom - for example, in the last century, the free love of the 20s changed the puritanism of the 30s, the 70s and so on for replacing the Liberal sixties. There is another opinion that young people acquire such guidelines before wars, but I don't want to think about it. Morality itself is beautiful. The main thing is that the generation in childbearing age is not interested in asceticism so much so that it is generally stopped to start the novels and families. Well, of course, an example of all sorts of idols is important. And it is also repeated. Nowadays, the young actress Brook Shields, which in the film "Blue Laguna" has almost all the time naked, becoming known, stated to the whole world, which is proud of his innocence. And, of course, her peers on the whole planet wanted to imitate her. Moreover, soon after that, Shields triumphantly married a rich and respected man.
I easily managed to find and "living" virgins who can give a clear answer about their motivations.
"We are four girlfriends, we are friends with school," a student of the 3rd course of Anya shares. - We concluded a pact that they would not part with virginity before the wedding. And the one that will make it collects everyone else in the restaurant at his own expense and tells why the pact broke.
- Well, has anyone already put on the restaurant?
- Yes, alone. She went with a guy to rest, and everything came out there. And soon after that, he threw her with a brief explanation - he did not hook. Gadko and hurt. But all the rest of the lesson.
- And not worse, if this is "not hooked," it turns out after the wedding?
- You know, if people have taken such a serious decision, how to marry, but at the same time they have not changed, it means that they have more serious reasons for this than sex! So, they have common interests, they respect each other, watch one way and on the way. And when all this is, the rest of the details will be attached.
Obomlev from the fact that in understanding youth sex is, it turns out, "details", proceed to a massive survey in social networks. And so I find out:
Inna, 18 years old, future coach : "Nowadays, nothing shame, but, on the contrary, is even strange, if you do not post your bare parts of the body in social networks. And any smart girl, if he wants to stand out from this mass, will come exactly the opposite - there is nothing strange here. "
Masha, 20 years old, Eco : "Now goes, as we have in our company, they call sex dumping. No one will not surprise with candid photo sessions, participation in a variety of beauty contests, etc. Wherever I spit, everywhere the model is a real or amateur. From the fact that everything is available and appeaset, even the guys are tired. And in order to emphasize their uniqueness, normal girls follow the "golden rule of honor." I know several universities where it is in fashion. It increases its own value in their own eyes. For example, I am going to love one man once and forever. Another question is that it will be difficult to conquer me - that is why. "
In several answers, a funny outrage of the attitude towards the "Golden Regulation" of Parents sounded. The ladies complain that moms and dads, instead of being proud of daughters, almost the doctor cause.
"I only hear," Sofia wrote me, 21 years old, "And here I am in your years ... Even the grandmother has already climbed with what my mom has already been in my years. I don't understand what they want? Previously, worried that the daughters walk with the boys. And now that they do not walk. "
And Seryozha too!
And here and "sketch" guys:
"I have a dream, and one day I will fulfill her! - recognized an anonymous virgin from the 3rd course of pedavis. - I want to spend my first night in life with a guy is the same inexperienced as me. I believe that intimate relationships with pure sheet will turn into loyalty and trust. "
Anonymous virgin has a male support group:
Anton, 20 years : "I have not slept with a woman. I do not advertise this, but I'm not ashamed. I think that the first time should be remembered in a positive sense, he also forms a further attitude towards sexual life at all. And the available offers that I have been still not satisfied with me in this sense. "
"Guys, I think that the number of women is yesterday! - Says an express in social networks under Nick Patriot. - Now the quality comes to the fore. A real man should have a faithful and one-piece girlfriend, which can be trusted. And not some Pestman, who will change you when you get tied to her. Or it will drag into you in the bed of another man or go to him with your children ... Therefore, there is no longer worthy of the role of a permanent girlfriend, it is better not to load extra problems. And if it's completely nursing, virtual sex for help! "
According to psychologists, this is the last advice and the terrible mystery of fashion for virginity lies and lies:
- Personal contacts in young people are reduced, the Internet replaces them, "the psychologist Alina Kolovova explains its position. - But at the same time, no one canceled ambitions. To be at an altitude of personal life, the girl should have a flawless appearance. And the young man must have money and status to conquer the very perfect beauty. And if earlier young people of both sexes were afraid to suffer a personal fiasco (she predamintors, he will nourish and quit), then today's youth is afraid of Fiasco Social. And the guys, and the girls are not looking at a person, and who has achieved anything, who has any prospects. And yet there is no significant social success, distracting personal life is dangerous for self-esteem, but will suddenly cost a more status peers? Perhaps on the periphery, this is not so noticeable, but in the metropolisms the so-called "fashion for virginity" and the possibility of virtual communication allows young men and girls to bring the theoretical base under their unwillingness to build real relationships and risk their ego.
- This is a sign of an unstable time, - confident Family psychologist Denis Turner. - Today, society as a whole tend to increase their moral potential, which usually happens in historical periods requiring the concentration of physical and psychological forces. Although the virginity itself is a fashion approximately every decade. The last surge, which came on zero years, had an explicit erotic-commercial attack. The fashion of those years was hand in hand with extensive medical proposals for the restoration of virginity and with the demand of secured men on chastity. Then there were prostitutes-virgin in fashion - that is, physically not devoid of innocence, but with extensive petting experience, oral sex, etc.
- Today we are seeing the Renaissance of the so-called "eternal values", which occasionally occurs around the world, - shares the teacher of the capital university with his considerations. - And the notorious Pai-girls and Pai boys are usually returned with eternal values. Comparing today's student audience with the one that has been a decade ago, a change in the behavior of girls - they have become more serious, at least with appearance. More than those who are spinning around the guys flirt and flirting. Even in clothes, students became modest than 10 years ago, - no mini and combat coloring, like European female students.
The most famous virgins:
Valery Novodvorskaya - Chaste Feminist: According to her own assurance, he never has sex: "Sex is not too fascinating. It's boring, I read. "
Susan Boyle is an unused pensioner: defeated in 2009 in the competition "Britain is looking for talents", he told that she had never been kissed in life, not to mention everything else ... But barely becomes famous, Susan met a man who deprived her innocence - In 53 years.
Lisa Kudrou is an innocent coquette: despite the playful role of Phoebe in the popular series "Friends", kept virginity until the official proposal of the hand and the heart, which Lisa received in 32 years.
Adrian Lima is a defective nude: actively advertising the seductive more good than the Victoria's Secret brand, nevertheless did not undress to unauthorized men. And only in 2009 in his 27 years, on Valentine's Day and its own marriage, Adriana presented his innocence to his newly new Basketball player Marco Yarich. And he stated that proud of his excerpt. "