In the life of each family, like any social organism, there are crisis moments. And very often contradictions in the family grow up to such an extent that people who have once loved each other turn into absolutely strangers, and even in the worst enemies. According to official statistics, 65% of the marriages in Russia broke up in 2018. If you think about it, it is scary figures: more than half of Russian families have not passed the test for strength. Moreover, a significant part of the marriage unions disintegrates in the first years of its existence.
The three main reasons for divorces, according to the same statistics - poverty and the impossibility of feeding the family, the inability and unwillingness to compromise and reckon with each other, treason and the jealousy of partners. These same reasons can be called both the main factors determining the crisis in family relationships, with the only feature that treason often becomes the result of an existing crisis, consequence of dissatisfaction with the partner as a whole or any aspect of relations with it (emotional, sexual).
Psychologist Roman Talanov
It is possible to distinguish several of the most dangerous in terms of the occurrence of the crisis in the relations of the phases in the life of the family. First of all, this is the first year of living together during which the spouses get used to (or not get used to) to live with each other. The second dangerous moment is the birth of a child and the year following him - two. It is at this time that it accounts for a very large number of divorces. The third crisis is about 7-8 years of marriage. The fourth crisis is 15-20 years of marriage, when children grow up, the spouses are growing, not only the victims of each other are lost, but also the previous sense of family existence.
It is very difficult to give advice on overcoming the crisis in relations, as each family is individual. The relations of each pair have their own characteristics and where one council is suitable and one model of action can not come up with other recommendations. The most important means against the crisis in the relationship is the ability to listen to each other and negotiate. Any relations of people with each other - a kind of diplomacy. It is necessary for spouses, firstly, to recognize the availability of a problem, and secondly, to learn to calmly listen to each other and take the point of view of the partner, even if it differs from its own, thirdly - not to make speaking solutions under the influence of emotions, momentary offense.
Perhaps the crisis that seems to you overcome, actually speaks only that your family relationships need a small adjustment, reassessment. At the same time, it is very important not to make family relationships on a general discussion, do not allow relatives or friends and girlfriends to determine your further behavior, affect your decisions. After all, it is only your life and live it to you!
The most important component of the life of any family is an emotional-intimate sphere. If the spouses lose their interest in each other in this regard, then such a family is doomed either on the official decay, or to maintain the visibility of relations between two completely strangers. In modern society, there is nothing gallopped in discussing a problem with each other in sexual life, find out their reasons, try to resolve them with mutually acceptable ways.
Of course, both a wife and her husband is very important throughout their life together to "keep themselves in a tone" to be interesting for their second half. Turning family life into a routine, in a boring duty inevitably leads to a crack. Therefore, communicate more with each other more, come up with a joint thing - it is common thing that unites spouses as it is impossible, respect each other and do not look for solutions to your family problems on the side.