"In the framework of long romantic relations, men usually give the priority of information related to the reproductive (that is, the sexual) value of the partner, while women are more likely to prefer the readiness of the partner to invest romantic (that is, emotional) resources in a steady pair," the study of 2017 will exercise Sex Differences in Reconciliation Behavior After Romantic Conflict. Psychologists explain that conciliatory sex allows partners to re-feel desirable and loved ones, but this pattern behavior cannot be called healthy. Explains why their position differs from the opinion of most people.
Cheating expectations
During a quarrel in your blood, the level of adrenaline hormone, produced in response to external irritation and your desire to prove its position. People who consider conciliatory sex with one of the lower ways of unity after a quarrel, wrong. Psychology Today magazine believes that the charge of positive emotions during this process violates the balance in relationships - after sex you return to the usual life that can seem to you. Psychologists compare the desire of conciliatory sex with drug addiction - a person literally gets a new dose, not only forbidden substances, and its necessary emotions. For some people, it can become a serious problem, because they will unconsciously begin to look for a reason for a quarrel for the sake of repetition of an intimate moment.
Throw negative emotions before switching to sex
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Emission of negative emotions
In psychology there is a term "excitement transfer", explaining the principle of brain performance after you quarrel with a partner. The accumulated negative emotions are transferred from the feeling of irritation on the feeling of excitement - that is why you certainly want to be intimidated with your loved one. In 2010, What Happanes WHEN WE GET AGRY? Hormonal, Cardiovascular and Asymmetrical Brain Responses »Describes similar characteristics of wrath and excitation feelings - increase pressure, acceleration of heartbeat, etc. During sex, you spend energy, together with which negative emotions are leaving, and in the completion of the process they are replaced with positive - sharp emission of adrenaline Gives a feeling of euphoria. However, the problem, due to which a quarrel occurred is not all deciding - this is the main pair error. First you have to calm down and talk a conflict question, only after that, when you ware the apologies and are aware of everything, it is worth talking about the intima.
Misunderstanding between partners
If you quarrel, and then interrupt and in the rustling of passions begin to have sex, there may be misunderstanding between you, which will later lead to an even greater quarrel. So far, one considers it the end of the conflict, the other will solve that sex is just a pause in discussing the issue, and will want to return to him later. Most often, the first position is peculiar to men, and the second - women. Usually girls are more deeply and long experienced a quarrel with a beloved, analyzing her in his head for a few days.
sex will not solve the problem, but only aggravate her
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Abusive behavior signals
One of the stages that psychologists stand out in the relationship between home tyrant and his victim - "honeymoon". It follows the presenter, which in normal relations exists only in the framework of the discussion of the issue at elevated colors, and in unhealthy is accompanied by insults, threats and even a fight. The abuser will certainly be the initiator of the conciliatory sex in order to hide his true face and "to change the guilt" before the victim in order to keep it under control. If in your relationship, no quarrel does without sex, contact a psychologist for advice and think seriously, there are no other signs pointing to the violation of the psyche in the beloved.