Often the theme of the money is painful in relations between spouses, and those who pass through the divorce know that money is the most important aspect of the relationship.
The heroine of today's article recently passed through a divorce with her husband, moved to another city, leaving the extensive property of the former spouse. They seem to be correct, friendly and without scandals. However, the incomplete money issue remained between them. By default, the divorce is the initiative of his wife, she and to deal with new housing, financial flows, independent budget. And the former husband is supposedly affected by the side, therefore, in the quality of compensation, he remained housing and other htaled benefits.
However, through the dreams of our dreams, another truth about their relationship, based on its genuine ideas about how they were to part.
So sleep:
"A former husband had dreamed. We are in our house, it seems to live, but I am on the rights of guest. I tell him that something is cold to me, I'm in the house everywhere Merznu. I just say so, not counting on the answer. And suddenly I come and see that it removes the wallpaper with walls with whole sheets and some Faneru sheets, on which these walls are pasted, straight on top of the Donism, and already pubeled and seen the nutrolas of these walls. To the question: "What are you doing?" He answers: "You said that it is cold, I am all the wader, I will put the insulation everywhere and it will not be cold." I'm shocked that my little "I'm cold" such a grand action is committed, especially since I know that the repairs are fresh and the walls are warm. "
The sleep of the heroine indicates how similar to her level of claims in real life. In a dream, her ex-husband is ready to take care of her, to equip her life, to respond to the call not that for help, but about simple human care. Probably our heroine does not know how to ask or even declare their needs for which it has the right. It is easier for her alone than to be in the position of asking. This is the common problem of women who loved the program "I myself".
The ability is useful, but reflects only a part of the necessary personal qualities. Rely on yourself - this is one of the parties to our independence. However, declare and insist on their rights is also the necessary ability for an adult. Without it, it is difficult to refuse, say "no", to demand what is due and to defend its position.
Our dreamy, most likely, is often inferior in life where it is necessary and not necessary. However, the sleep "trains" her for a new experience is to declare their needs and desires. For example, inform the former husband that it is necessary to bring order in their financial affairs, to speak, as their cash contract should actually look after a divorce, is there any property that they can divide by law. It will acquire a "warm" house, and he will be free from the sense of guilt for the extra property, which was assigned to them by default.
As a rule, if there is a mess in the relationship and an unfair decision of any kind, this does not allow former partners to truly part and build life on a clean field. Unspoken claims, resentment and anger will fasten them for many years, condemning for loneliness or building relationships with a new partner, but on old "yeast".
We recommend the risk of being honest and persistent to take a risk of being honest and persistent, to bring up in relationship with a former husband and prepare yourself for new relationships if she dreams of them.
And what dreams of you? Send your stories by mail: [email protected].
Maria Dyachkova, PSYCHOLOGIST, Family therapist and leading trainings of personal growth Training center Marika Khazin