"We go with my mother along the coast, along the path with pines, go to the sea. And I say my mother with a feeling: "Mom, this is my home, it's my place! I like it here, I am wonderful here! "Mom answers:" You are alone here, you will not handle! "I ran around to the sea, I scream sand from the bottom and say:" I can't Clean, I like even the dirt! "I like it from this Shore, I send her home and returning alone along the bank. I see a man who cares here for animals: kittens, tigers and other cats. I suggest him to help with a nursery, in everything to be supported to him and say that I need protection and payment of my work. He replies that everything is good that I will take care of kittens and can live with him. "
Clarissa Pinkol Estes, a Jungian therapist who wrote the famous book "Running with Wolves", spoke in his writings about the initiation of a woman - that is, the dedication of a young woman in adulthood. And it receives this initiation from his mother. In other words, a young girl should get a blessing from Mom to the fact that she has its own life that it has the right to his mistakes, his family, their children, their dreams. That she matured so much that no longer needs the instructions of the mother, but only needs her support.
Sleeping this girl says that she has already risen so much to tell his mother, that she can continue to live herself that she has gained her home, his destiny, which says goodbye to his mother, as with the only mentor. She meets a person with whom will raise children and support him.
In fact, it would be good that all young women would pass such a process. In most cases, the mature separation from the mother does not occur. Mothers continue to interfere in the life of adult daughters, raise their children, criticize their family life. And adult daughters are not able to defend themselves from this onion, like small girls who are afraid to disappoint or offend mom.
This process is characteristic of our society. The separation from parents does not occur, which means that this initiation in adulthood life is also. Therefore, adult women often behave with mothers like offended babies.
But our dreamy seems to bring the right order in relations with his mother. And this is the best thing that could have happened on the eve of the wedding.
Maria Dyachkova, PSYCHOLOGIST, Family therapist and leading trainings of personal growth Training center Marika Khazin