You are already an adult girl, and live your life separately from the parents. If this is about you, you probably know the situation when parents cease to understand you. They may behave in such a way that it is difficult for you to suffer, but you do not need to be outraged and clap the door: they cannot be changed, and you need to learn to understand them.
And no, the Internet is not the best tool for maintaining warm relationships. Now most parents know how to use the computer and are actively mastering the social networks, so it seems that there may be problems in communication and understanding? However, in addition to views of your photos from vacation, they can write to you something like: "You rest there, and your grandmother / me / father has risen the pressure. A little to the ambulance did not come! " And you begin to blame yourself for the absence in their lives. In fact, parents want livelihood with you, just do not always well choose how to tell you about it. We collected the basic methods that parents enjoy, and tell how to react.
Communication means will not replace live communication
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Parents begin to ban
"For restaurants why go? We spend so much money, it would be better to take the baby to the sea or would take a mortgage! " At first it seems that parents are trying to forbid you to live according to your rules, because of what you fall into rabies.
Calm down, take a deep breath and look at yourself from the side. Who do you look like at this point? Right, on a capricious little girl. Your desires, as in childhood, do not coincide with the parents, so your inner child is not ready to put up with it. However, parents do not pursue any other purpose, except to protect you.
How to react to it?
If parents believe that you need their tip in everything, tell them more about new acquaintances, about achievements that you have learned about and what problems are at the moment. It is important to understand that you do not do everything called parents, but you know yourself.
Parents interfere with your life
"Why can't you take that card from the bank? How much already SMS came, and she still lies in the department! "
And the parents do not understand that you pull to the latter so that they do not recognize the number from the card to which they will constantly drop you "on the child", because you spend so much on yourself. " Instead, they could fix the father's car or go to Puerto Rico for a week.
How to react?
Decide for which frames you do not want to come to communicate with your parents. If you are somewhat in the family, share the duties, for example, you give parents once a year travel abroad, and your brother or sister helps them to solve domestic issues and so on.
Also, if you receive money from parents, you cannot avoid questions that you spent them, because they sent you "to completely different." In order not to fall into dependence, do not take anything and do not be obliged.
Tell us about your feelings and thoughts
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Parents are constantly complaining
"Let's go to the country, do you know how difficult it is to work there to two pensioners? That would go with us, we would finish the day! "
Of course, parents do not say such things specifically to touch you. They simply not enough of your attention, from here and "born" reproach. Do not be angry and do not outraget openly: perhaps you are really distinguished, and parents just do not know how to attract your attention. Think how to make communication and meetings constant so that parents do not feel abandoned.
Send parents on vacation
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How to react correctly?
Tell your parents about your feelings, it is better to even prepare several phrases, for example: "Mom, you upset me when you start to reproach, let's find a way to solve our misunderstanding without charges." No one said that it would be easy. Explain why you are important to their support. Adults are solving difficult situations by communication, so show parents that you are an adult, having entered into a dialogue, instead of hugging offended.
Do not tell about yourself absolutely all
Mom absolutely not exactly to know about each of your quarrels with her husband: you will soon make it up, and my mother will worry for a long time, and maybe even start hateing a son-in-law. Relat parents and leave some of your problems with you.
As you can see, it is not so difficult to maintain the right contact, the main thing is to behave as an adult, not "releasing" a capricious child.