Modern view of family psychology is the most interesting knowledge. Another hundred years ago, psychology was studying incentive and reactions to him, and now a long journey has passed and explores how the birthplace of destinies affects us. And we live in them and do not understand how we unconsciously manage the legacy of our family system.
For example, our contemporary Bert Hellinger, known for the whole method of family alignments, said that the children were unborn for various reasons nevertheless remain in the family system. There is a memory of them, feelings associated with them, secrets and prohibitions. Energetically, they are present in the family, especially when they are trying to forget about them and not think. It can be refer to this theory, like a shamanism or even nonsense. But before close this page, read the dream of our dreams. Maybe he will open for you curious things:
"I read an article about abortions yesterday and how they affect the born children. I thought about how 5 unborn my brothers and sisters could influence me. And I dream to sleep in the morning, as if we were a guy - I and another 5 people, whom I do not know personally, but I know what they are, they are involved in the murder of the princess Diana (no less). And I am involved only by what I know who and how I killed her, but did not participate in the crime. And here I am, as an involuntary witness of this, hiding at home her corpse. For some reason, he lies in a long white box, like from under shoes, and a box of a narrow body for the body, so it opens all the time. We need to get rid of the corpse, but we do not know how to do it imperceptibly. Worried that only me, because he is at me at home. And it starts to stink, decompose, and in general terribly and scary. And I understand in a dream that, in a good way, it is necessary to do everything as it should: bury, bury, etc., but for some reason it is scary, and everything is against, and as if it should be done so that no one knows no . For us, we have a contract that we get rid of the corpse and then all these 6 people must die, including me, so that no one dishes anything. And I understand that I don't seem to do with it, but as if everything is already predetermined and will have to die because of this. "
Sleep is transparent! This girl knows about the murder, even though she did not commit him. We are talking about abortions made by her mother. She also knows that she is not the only child in the family, but their total six. In this group, they try to hide the murder. All this "concealment" in her house, since it is she keeps the memory of them, thinks, fantasies, raises the question of the influence of five unborn brothers and sisters. And she is the only one who wears this memory on themselves, since the only born daughter. It is she who knows that the box in a dream is too small for this mystery (it still opens for her).
The systemic approach in family psychology suggests that it is unconsciously everyone in the family knows the events taking place in it, as well as from love for his loved ones, they are trying to correct their tragic fates. Thus, the dreamy seeks to divide the fate of his brothers and sisters and knows what should die to keep the secret. That is, she seeks to connect with her family, which she remembers, even if he is not aware of. This desire can manifest itself in protracted periods of apathy, indifference, unwillingness to live their lives, depreciating themselves and their tasks, the inability to build mature relationships, even diseases.
Our dreams need to learn how to separate themselves from the fate of those kids who were not born. To do this, she should tell him like a spell: "There is no my guilt in your destiny. I have my own life. I can't live for someone else. "
And, perhaps, this is a wonderful formula not only for her. And sleep is a step to a separation from the family unconscious.
Maria Dyachkova, PSYCHOLOGIST, Family therapist and leading trainings of personal growth Training center Marika Khazin