Undoubtedly, fantasies of sexual genus can visit everyone, but it is possible to decide on their implementation only every third, according to statistics. If both partners trust each other and not considerable relationships, there is nothing reprehensible that, for example, make love in an unusual place or invite the third to your "company". However, not all our desires are born naturally: psychological injuries or experiences from the past can give birth in our consciousness of the desire that can hardly be called healthy.
Pleasure through suffering
Sex - a collective process, the result of which depends on the mood of each of the partners. In a healthy relationship, each of the parties understands that it can give a partner and what a loved one can "answer" in bed. If you both feel the pleasure of an intimate process, there is no reason for excitement. Problems arise if you cannot get an intense from a positive contact - the desire for psychological or physical suffering is often due to the inability to get an orgasm in a comfortable environment. A person requires a splash of emotions, and not always positive to finally discharge. This feature can be called in some kind of masochism. In this situation, it is important to turn to a specialist in time in order not to lose a desire and interest in sex under normal conditions. Be careful to yourself.
sex should bring pleasure to both
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The desire to cause pain
Reverse masochism situation. When you understand that your proximity to the partner no longer causes the previous bright emotions, "coloring" your intimate in various ways, including erotic games. Dangerous turning situation takes if you reach a peak only inconvenience or pain to the partner or pain, let him not express discontent. This desire talks about the beginning of some psychological disorders, which it is important to pay attention to and work with a psychologist to avoid further development.
Sex as a way to lift self-esteem
Sometimes failures in real life can bring almost unbearable discomfort. In our nature, the desire to bypass the opponent is laid, and if this does not happen, let's say at work or in other areas of life, the psyche persistently requires compensation. Often, people find salvation in intimate contact: the idea that "I need it is needed by", "I am important / -n for a partner," maybe some time to get despair for some time, but at the same time pleasure from sex will receive only with constant scrolling of thought about its importance in the head. As you understand, self-esteem can not hold on exclusively on sex, as well as proximity is not built on dependence.