In December, this is not the first dream of readers about relationships with her husband. The general topic is the lack of proximity, partnership relations. It seems that this is a sad trend. Unfortunately, we are not taught to create a relationship of love. Schools teach a variety of items, but it does not apply to family life. And most parents do not realize what lessons of family life are presented to their children. For example, living for children, destroy the partner bonds. The child in such a family, on the one hand, does not appreciate the relationship of the partnership, because they crash in his eyes, on the other hand, feels deep guilt for the life of the parents. Just this guilt, people continue to death their parents and still remain in non-demand debt.
About this Son of our heroine: "I dream of our house in which we and my husband and our child in a wheelchair, our mothers, guests, friends. Everyone needs something: a child - to walk, Mama - to communicate, my friends are called somewhere, in the house you need to get out, prepare food. And my husband and I tear away between these affairs and people. At the same time, in a dream, we with my husband and I want to free yourself from all worries and have sex, stay together and not to be distracted for anyone. And I have feelings for him in a dream so trembling, gentle, strong, as in the days of our first dates. I sprinkle with the thought that in my life our feelings strongly stuck, there is a lot of affairs between us and other people. And I longer in closeness with him and tender love. "
Sleep illustrates her how many unnecessary characters she and her husband were placed among themselves: parents, children, friends, colleagues, homemade cares. They did not leave places each other. The dream reflects the longing and sadness of one of the partners about the fact that they become unavailable to each other.
Although if they appealed to the family therapist, then, most likely, the direction of work would be to restore an untouchable partnership. Family therapy argues that our connection with the partner is primary and priority, and then with children and parents. This connection, if it is durable and inviolable, makes it possible to love other family members and take care of them. In our culture, this is a controversial axiom, because children were always in the first place for most families. And our heroine will have to rethink her partnership with her husband. While she belongs to him on the residual principle, unfairly by making him attention. Not only he suffers from this, but she, and their connection with each other.
Therefore, the relationship is not a constant, they will always be inserted and be careful with a partner. Life is changing, the family grow up, the relationship will also change the former passion, tenderness and romance will pass. Therefore, it is necessary to create it consciously and daily. And this is worthy of work.
I wonder what dreams of you? Waiting and your letters with examples of dreams! Send your stories by mail: [email protected].
Maria Dyachkova, PSYCHOLOGIST, Family therapist and leading trainings of personal growth Training center Marika Khazin