"Hello Maria!
My name is Tatyana. I have serious problems with my husband. We have been married for four years. I got married when I was 20. Then I studied at the institute. My husband is older for 10 years. Now I graduated from the university, got a job. Worked for a year. I was raised in office. I like it insanely, and I dream of a successful career. But her husband has other plans. He wants a child, and not one. I understand that we are not married that he has age, he is time. And I myself do not have anything against children. But now it's not at all on the cashier now, if ... quarreling because of this constantly. He says everything that he wants children that career is not a female business. And I disagree with him. And I do not want to give up at all. It is still exacerbated by the fact that my and his parents on his side. I understand that no one will decide this problem for me, but I really want to hear your comment as a psychologist. Thanks in advance!"
Good afternoon, Tatiana!
I will try to express your considerations on this. Perhaps they will be useful for you.
In your situation, of course, have a strong influence of social stereotypes. First of all, that the role of a woman in maintaining a homemade focus and raising children, and the role of a man, respectively, in making money. Representatives of "weak gender" in this situation, of course, is very difficult. To sacrifice your interests for the sake of family, to live for others is a severe share. In addition, one of the main problems of many women is joined here - everyone likes to meet the expectations of others to be desirable. They go to many for this, in the depths of the soul, hoping that their feats will be rewarded. And men often do not attach their values to their efforts. Like, it is necessary. So it turns out that many women are driven into the angle. The desire to like and be desired flashes many opportunities - self-determination, independence, career and power. Thus, staying in captivity of public stereotypes, the woman ceases to look for himself, is moving away from his personality farther and farther. But the rules exist in order to break them! You can seek to live in harmony with you, try to find the balance between your desires and the desires of others. Risk, lose and win. Believe in your abilities and not be distracted by the fact that others will think. After all, without trying, you will not know, it is suitable, and in fact or not;)
And, by the way, besides, not all men like the priest and homemade girls ...
On this topic there is a wonderful book of U. Erhard "Good girls go to heaven, and bad - where they want, or why obedience does not bring happiness."