Uthando luyinto eyinkimbinkimbi. Awusoze wazi ukuthi ngubani ukunambitheka komuntu okudongeni, nokuthi ngabe unobuhlobo esikhathini esizayo. Kodwa-ke, owesifazane ngamunye e-Arsenal unamasu ambalwa asiza ukusheshisa ushintsho ekuxhumaneni nobungane emihlanganweni yothando. Izokwabelana ngezimfihlo nalabo, ngenxa yethenda, abakafundi ukuthola indlela eya kubantu babantu.
Ukumamatheka - isikhali esikhulu
Ubani ongafuna ukuqhubeka nokuxhumana - nomuntu omamatheka kuwe noma labo abahlekisayo noma abakhombisi imizwa nhlobo? Kunengqondo ukuthi iningi labantu lizokhetha inketho yokuqala. Selutha ngokuqondile kubantu abanengqondo - futhi lokhu kuqinisekisa isayensi. Ngakho-ke umagazini weForbes ubhala ngocwaningo lwe-UC Berkley, olwabanjelwe iminyaka engama-30: afundwe izithombe zabafundi ama-albhamu wezithombe ezindala, abese ecubungula izimpilo zawo ekugcineni kokufunda kwesikole. Kwavela ukuthi abantu abajwayele ukumamatheka baphumelela kakhulu kunontanga enoshukela kuzo zonke izindawo - impilo yomuntu siqu, umsebenzi, ubudlelwano phakathi kwabantu. Ngakho-ke ukumamatheka, bangane, futhi nakanjani uzohlangana nothando lwakho!
Umbuke ngqo esweni
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Ngisemathandweni
"Ngingalingisa kanjani ukubukeka ngothando?" - Uyabuza. Futhi sizophendula ukuthi yini okufanele siyenze silula: Buza amamodeli ochwepheshe njengoba bejika leli qhinga ezithombeni zomshado ezinamawele kanye nokuthwebula isitayela sesitolo sothando, lapho kufanele baveze umbhangqwana othandana naye okokuqala ngqa empilweni. Ukuze uvumelane, udinga ukukhumbula uhlobo oluthile lwesikhathi sempilo yakho lapho ubusethandweni noma isenzo sothandekayo. Ngemuva kwalokho sikujabulela indlela yokuziphatha etholakala esondweni nomuntu: ukulutha kancane inhloko ye-Lobby, ukumamatheka namakhona omlomo futhi ngezikhathi ezithile kubhekisisa kusuka ku-interlocutor. Ungalungisa izinwele ngemuva kwezindlebe noma umucu womoya omunwe wakho. Ngisho nendoda enqunyelwe kakhulu iyazi ukuthi uyakuthanda - khona-ke uzobona uzwela lokuphendula, noma ukunganaki ngokuphelele futhi uqonde konke ngokwakho.
Ukuma okuqondile
Lapho nje uqondisa umhlane wakho futhi ususe amahlombe emuva, ukubukeka kwakho kuguqulwe ngokushesha. Kuvela inhlansi emehlweni, isibalo siba slimmer, futhi ithiphu lokuziqhenya kwakhala liphakeme kancane. Ezingeni eliphansi, le ndoda ifunda isinali yakho ekutshela ukuthi uyazithanda futhi uyawazisa. Futhi abantu, banelise bona kanye nezimpilo zabo, njengoba wazi, ukuheha ukunakwa kwabanye - bafuna ukuzidonsa. Uma uvame ukuba yi-sludge, ukubuyiselwa ukuze usize wonke umuntu abe yincwadi futhi egqoke izicathulo esithendeni esiphansi.
Inkulumo eseduze
Emhlanganweni wokuqala, akunakwenzeka ukuthi ukwazi ukukhuluma amakha- perfeiting: Ngesikhathi sokuqomisana, abantu abaningi bafaka ngokungazi, ngokuziphatha okuletha inguqulo ethuthukisiwe yomuntu wamanje. Kepha ngemuva kwezinsuku ezimbalwa, nakanjani uzothola ulimi olujwayelekile bese usuka ezindabeni zezindaba ezihlekisayo ezingxoxweni ezisondelene kakhulu. Lapho umuntu ekuthemba ngamaphupho akhe futhi ekhuluma ngempilo ye-peripetics, kungukuthi ngaleso sikhathi kubonakala sengathi singokoqobo. Abantu abane-Ensurania ethuthukisiwe kulula kakhulu ukuthandwa umuntu ophilayo kunasemfanekisweni owethulwe emphakathini.
Hug indoda ukuze ihle
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Ukuthinta okukhanyayo
Ochwepheshe bezengqondo banokwamukelwa okuyimfihlo okusebenza ngokuhamba kancane. Ukuhlela umuntu kuwe, emhlanganweni udinga ukuthinta ingalo yesandla sakhe sokunene. Into esemqoka ukuthi indoda uqobo ngokwayo ayikuboni lokhu - hlola iqhinga elinjalo ngesikhathi sengxoxo emnandi lapho ume phambi komunye nomunye. Futhi ungathinta ngezikhathi ezithile ihlombe lakhe, uthathe umuntu osondelene noma aqabule ekuhambeni. Ukuxhumana okuxhumanisa nomuntu omnandi kithi kuvusa ukuthuthukiswa kwama-hormone we-oxytocin ne-dopamine, "ukuphumula" futhi kusinike umuzwa omnandi we-euphoria kusukela endabeni entsha.