Ingcinga yokuba ngumntwana ukunika ingxelo yokuba ayigazi, itreyini ezininzi zabazali abamkhulisayo. Olunye loloyiko oluphambili-uya kuva kuMama noTata, ongengowommi, kwaye uya konzakala kuye. Ngaba kufuneka ndizifihle iimfihlo zokwamkelwa komntwana abengowakho? Ukuba sithetha inyani, njani?
Akunakwenzeka ukuba uthule
Kutheni le nto amabali okufumana umntwana ongamzalanga abe ngowakho Kuba kukho iphethini engalunganga. Ukuba "yiphose, akadingi mntu." "" "Kwintsapho engendawo, ke ngoko ngokwakhe uphuthiwe." Hayi indlela ekukhathaza ngayo la mazwi athethwa "ngabantu abalungileyo"! Zeziphi iziphumo ezimbi zinokuba ziziphumo!
Ndihlala ndiqhubeka. Kwaye esi selceli cebiso.
Ndilapha ukubakhusela.
Ndilapha ukugcina eyona nto ibaluleke kakhulu esinayo emva kothando - ukuthembela ngaphandle kwemeko.
Ndilapha ukuze bazi ukuba i-rourti eyomeleleyo ingemva kwabo.
Ndilapha ukwazi ukuba uyathandwa kwaye uyafuna.
Ndilapha ukuze ndithethe. Ukuthetha inyani.
Le ncoko ingcono inokwakhiwa, ixhomekeke kule migaqo ilandelayo endazibenzele yona kwinkqubo yokunxibelelana nabantwana bam.
UValentina Krasnikova ngumama wabantwana abayi-17, abali-14 olwamkelo
1. Sixelele malunga nentlanganiso yakho, malunga nesona siganeko sifanelekileyo
Susa umntwana osuka kwi-Filistine ujonge abantwana abakhulayo, njengabo bantwana abanexesha elinzima. Makhe ave ukuba loluphi ulonwabo kunye nethamsanqa olwamkelekileyo. Njengokulinda, bendifuna ndafumana. Kuya kuba kubalulekile ukuba ave malunga nendlela omthanda ngayo xa sibona okokuqala. Ukuba umntwana akamgatyanga umntu, kodwa, ngokuchasene, yeyona ilindelwe kakhulu. Ngenye imini kuza ixesha xa umntwana eqonda ukuba iifoto apho angumntwana, hayi. Ifani nefani kunye ne-patrolicma kwabanye. Umbuzo "Ndivela njani?" Iya kuvela kwiincoko ziyakhula rhoqo. Ngeli xesha ndixelela umntwana ibali lakhe ngamagama athambileyo endiyaziyo. Ndithetha into enje: "Ntombi, khumbula, ndikuxelele? Sikufumene xa sele uphumile kakhulu, kwaye emva koko ndaba ngumama wakho! Ndikuthanda kakhulu kwaye ndingaze ndikunike mntu! Ungumntwana wam! " Ndiphinda eli bali amaxesha amaninzi ukuze wonke umntu, ngakumbi abantwana, anokuziva umzuzu. Bahlala belibala, ke ndiphindaphinda amabali ethu kwakhona, ndibeka lonke uthando lwam kuzo.
Omnye umzekelo wembali elungileyo uxelela umfundi wam: "Intombi endala ekhulayo kwasebusaneni. Ngoku uphantse uneminyaka emi-4 ubudala. SUKUFUNA UKUPHILA NOKUVUMBELA KUMBI. Rhoqo sihamba ngoogqirha, ngokulandelelana, imibuzo yemfuza kunye nokukhulelwa okuzala umntwana ezandleni zakhe. Vala iindlebe zakhe kwaye uzuza. Wazalwa umntakwabo omncinci. Kwakukho isizathu sencoko apho ithathiwe khona abantwana. Yaqala ukubuza malunga ne-tummy njalo njalo. Ke mna ndinobubele, ngobunono, nothando lwamcacisela ukuba akukho, akaveli kwi-tummy yam, kodwa evela komnye umakazi. Wayivulela enye imfihlelo, kodwa andizalanga nako ukuzala, kodwa siyamthanda. Uyabona, akunyanzelekanga ukuba uzala umntu oza kuthanda! Kwaye utata wam bendifuna ukuze sibe nesiqu sakho, eyona ntombazana imangalisayo, sikuthanda kakhulu! "Ngelixa olu lwazi lwanele, kodwa ndiyazi ukuba uza kuphinda abuye kwakhona. Ngaphakathi silungile. Ndithethe notatoyekhulu malunga nokuba kuthetha ntoni kwaye uthini xa intombi iqala njani ukuyibuza. "
Into ephambili kukuba izole ngaphakathi kwaye iqinisekile. Ilungile, ayigutyungelwanga. Yenza ibali lakho leSapho elilungileyo malunga nentlanganiso kwangaphambili kwaye liphindaphinde abantwana kwakhona.
2. Vula abazali bendalo
Kungekudala, umntwana ngokuqinisekileyo uya kubuza ngabazali bayo bemvelo. Ewe kunjalo, uya kuqala ekufumanisa kunzima ukuba nomdla kwaba bantu kwaye kutheni kulandelayo. Ukuba umntwana wawa entsatsheni esele kwesabudala, ukhumbula yonke into kakuhle. Rhoqo kufuneka athethe ngaphandle, susa iintlungu eziqokelelweyo kwaye woyike ngaphakathi. Into ephambili ayiphazamisi ukuba ayithi musa ukuthintela. Ngeli xesha, ngokwenene ufuna inkxaso yakho, kubandakanya nokukholisa ukuba le asilotyala lakhe ukuba ubomi buphele. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba ndidlulise kuwo wonke umntwana-umntwana wemfuza azele, onke la mazwi onke. Wonke umntu unokukhetha! Saye safumanana, thina sinenye, kwaye ngenxa yoko kuya kwenzeka okubi, ngaphandle kwayo yonke into eyenzeke "ngaphambili." Xa umntwana ekhula, uya kufuna ukufumana, thelekisa, uthathe isisombululo sakho. Kodwa ukuba unayo yonke into, ukuba ubuthenjwa ngako ukuba ubuthande enyanisweni, ayiyi kuba nentsingiselo kulwalamano lwakho naye.
"Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba ndidlulisele kumntwana ngamnye-akukho mgwebo wemfuza."
3. Umntu ngamnye-ngokwahlukileyo
Nokuba umntwana ufunde malunga nokwamkelwa kwakho, ngokufuthi olu lwazi lube kukubetha kwakhe. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuhlala kugxininiswa ekuthathekeni komntwana kwinto yokuba wenza into ekhethekileyo kusapho. Kunye naye, abazali kunye nosapho lonke baba nesityebi, benomdla ngakumbi kwaye benobuchule. Yonke into ibalulekile ukuyiqonda into eyahlukileyo, kutheni ndimthanda kwaye yintoni kanye kanye apho ufuna khona - usapho lwakho. Ubalisa kakhulu amabali ahlekisayo, u-Andryhasha uzoba kakuhle, iNatasha inokwenzeka ukuze ifumane yonke! Kubalulekile ukuba sazi ngamnye wabantwana uhlobo olunjani lwetalente eyahlukileyo. Kwaye kubalulekile ukuva isiqinisekiso esivela kwaba bazali. Kwakhona kwakhona.
Imfihlo yokwamkelwa komntwana abengowomnye umntu okanye abantu ngokusemthethweni okanye ukwamkelwa komntwana abengowomnye umntu okanye abantu ngokusemthethweni.
Eyona mpazamo imbi sinokuvuma ngelo xesha umntwana oya kuyifumana njani le nyaniso ukuba angayifumani inyani- iya kukhokelela ekuthetheleleni kwakhe kumphefumlo wakhe ukuba abazali bambulale. Kwaye ke umntwana kunye nothusayo ke ngoku bothuka, kwaye abazali bathuka enkulu kwaye bethembekile kwicala lakhe ebomini. Isizungu kunye nemvakalelo yokungcatsha. Imibuzo Kutheni uthe cwaka ukuba akukho nto imbi yokwamkelwa?
Bazali abathandekayo, zilungiselele inyani yokuba impendulo kwiindaba zokwamkelwa komntwana abengowomnye umntu okanye abantu ngokusemthethweni. Kodwa, ngokungathandabuzekiyo, iNyaniso, intetho enobubele nentliziyo enothando evela entliziyweni yothando, iya kuba lula ukusinda kunenkohliso yenkohliso yeyona isondeleyo, ndiyakuqinisekisa. Kwaye kube kanye, ukuba ngumntu omdala, umntwana wakho uya kuthi: "Mama notata, enkosi ngokunyaniseka. Enkosi ngento ondenzele yona. Ndiyakuthandana!"